Feeling free for the first time

[Elphanigh]

Had major progress in my therapy session today, and I am existing a bit on cloud nine because of it. We are using a mix of the flash method and emdr to process through my memories, for both me and the less integrated little Elphas. It is really taxing and difficult work but it isn't paying off. I got to the point with a memory today that it was neutral, and the positive beliefs were finally feeling true. "I survived, I am free" for adult me, for six year old me it was " I am okay, I am safe". This feels hopeful and light.

Getting to feel neutral and like the memory was just that, a memory, and not a current event is amazing. It is hard to explain that it feels like there is a distance from it. That it is okay and it sucked but I can handle it.  I feel strong, brave, and free tonight.

I wanted to celebrate with you so much 

[Rainagain]

That is brilliant, really pleased for you.

To turn something into a memory and then to put it back where it belongs? That is a huge thing to do.

I've done some emdr and its tough stuff. You have achieved something that is hard to do. And you understand that, no wonder you are pleased, you have made real progress today.

[Elphanigh]

Rainagain, I really appreciate the validation on this being a big thing to accomplish. It helps me recognize that success even more fully for someone to recognize how hard it is to accomplish. I have a long way to go but know it is possible for me now. Thank you for the positive words 

[Deep Blue]

Elphanigh,
  I'm inspired by you.  That is hard work and I'm glad it is helping.  You are very brave 
Love ya,
Deep Blue

[Elphanigh]

Thank you, Deep Blue   

[woodsgnome]

                 


May you savor this moment as something you've deserved for so long!  May there be more to come. Now you have a new memory, of this day.

You said it best: "I survived, I am free" for adult me, for six year old me it was " I am okay, I am safe". This feels hopeful and light.

Congrats...

[Sceal]

 
Woooh! That is amazing and wonderful Elpha! So happy to hear that you're making vital progress in your recovery!

[Eyessoblue]

So pleased for you, it's such a good feeling isn't it when you achieve something for yourself in therapy and you feel like you've overcome huge obstacles, let's hope it continues for you!

[Elphanigh]

Thank you all for celebrating this with me! It is such an amazing feeling to have a place to go and celebrate these types of victories 

[Andyman73]