A thought about vulnerability and abuse

[ah]

I talked to two people in lots of pain lately, they were as different as could be from one another but they were both suffering. I noticed for a moment, they each had the exact same expression on their face: completely open and visible, like they forgot their guard. Like they were being seen and for a second they let go.

It was gone in a split second but I thought: Oh No, this must be what abusers see in others.

On me it had a sobering effect. It made me doubly cautious and gentler, but I guess an abuser would see it as a prize as a golden opportunity.
It sort of helped me understand that odd fire I can see in sadists' eyes just before they attack. We may not be aware of these moments, but they are. Maybe.

[Deep Blue]

Standing with you on this Ah. I remember that glimmer in the eye of the sadistic abuser.  Scary, sobering and true.

[Libby183]

Good point,  Ah.

I believe absolutely that my abusive mother could see the vulnerability in me very clearly.  She was very attuned to it, because she was vulnerable in exactly the same ways, due to her unhappy childhood.  She always said that I was just like her and this made it so easy for her to hurt me.

To see someones vulnerability and then choose to be extra kind is a great character trait, Ah.

Thank you for this post.  It really got me thinking.