Canít stop crying

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Eyessoblue

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Canít stop crying
« on: July 19, 2018, 01:58:33 PM »
About a year ago I wrote how I canít cry, this week I canít stop. I saw a Cbt lady on Tuesday and Iíve done a bit of inner child work with a private therapist lately. Since Tuesday tho I just keep crying which is weird because we didnít really talk about much apart from my anxiety now which I quickly realised is more depression then anxiety.
Iíve been out today with friends but had to keep disappearing for Ďtoiletí breaks so I could wipe my tears, I donít know why Iím crying, Iím not even thinking of anything in particular. I was food shopping earlier and had tears rolling down my face, no sobs or noises just tears pouring from me.
Does anyone have any suggestions as to what is going on? This is extremely rare for me to be like this and itís starting to freak me out a little, Iíve also had not very nice thoughts about me and the rest of my life etc which again I feel like Iíve never been or felt this low before. 

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Blueberry

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Re: Canít stop crying
« Reply #1 on: July 19, 2018, 02:18:32 PM »
I don't have any ideas about the reason behind it but I wonder: Can you allow yourself to accept this as a necessary and probably beneficial stage in healing? I presume that physically and emotionally some part of you knows what it is doing with this crying.

I have had spontaneous crying before for no reason I could fathom. It did stop eventually as I'm sure yours will too. "This too shall pass." Really. Hard to believe in the really low phases, but true.  :hug:
Should is
never good,
for me.

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Libby183

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Re: Can’t stop crying
« Reply #2 on: July 19, 2018, 10:09:23 PM »
This does sound so overwhelming,  Eyessoblue.  It's not something that I have experienced,  but I do wonder if Blueberry is on to something with her idea that it's a phase you need to pass through in order to move on. Perhaps it is linked to your realisation that you are sad and depressed,  not solely anxious.

Since my therapy ended, I would say that depression has taken more of a hold on me. When I was more anxious than depressed,  I was more involved in things, keeping myself busy.  Now I'm more depressed and "what's the point of doing...whatever".  Perhaps our therapy has had more of an effect than we initially thought.

It does sound as if you need to cry a lot of things out. I hope very much that you get through it and go into the next phase and, as ever,  I am right here beside you.

Take care.

Libby.
« Last Edit: July 19, 2018, 10:11:22 PM by Libby183 »

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Eyessoblue

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Re: Canít stop crying
« Reply #3 on: July 20, 2018, 02:34:24 AM »
Thank you both yes I guess youíre right. Libby I think youíre right even tho I had my last emdr ages ago I still feel in some ways that new things suddenly come into my head and buried away things are re surfacing, maybe thatís more of a flashback tho then a Ďmemory Ď as such. I know itís good to cry but from my perspective when I never have, itís really alarming me that I am this way now.
Iím doing more inner child work this afternoon so will see how I cope with that, I guess itís just releasing all those trapped feelings etc, normally I push it away but donít seem to be able to do that this time.
Libby, I hope youíre doing ok? Interesting what you say about the depression side as that is exactly how I feel too. Thanks for your on going support.

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Alias

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Re: Canít stop crying
« Reply #4 on: August 06, 2018, 01:47:45 PM »
Eyessoblue, I have had (what seems like) the same thing since I started therapy.  Just sitting in class taking notes, and suddenly the paper's wet.  Just tears, no noise or anything, no "feeling" of wanting to cry.  You mentioned on another post that you also have issues with dissociation and not feeling emotions.  My therapist told me that it's possible to have the physiological response without registering the emotion causing it.  Perhaps you were used to dealing with certain issues that you already knew about, but were caught off guard by the sudden realization that you might be dealing with depression?  Maybe it's the actual depression?  Whatever the case may be, it sounds a lot like the "crying" I've experienced, which I'm told is connected to a real emotion that the dissociative symptoms are masking.  I have also been told that the content/direction of your thoughts can also be clues to an underlying feeling.  I'm sorry you have to deal with this.  It's disconcerting to have to guess what you're feeling/why your body is doing weird things. 

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Eyessoblue

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Re: Canít stop crying
« Reply #5 on: August 07, 2018, 02:12:03 AM »
Alias, thank you for that, it makes sense what you say and my dissociation is a definite part of all this. Itís so strange how or when it just starts, no particular trigger just tears pouring and a real intense feeling of sadness is all I can say. I do suffer with depression too and I feel like that has got a lot worse of late so I guess the combination of both isnít helping me. Thank you for your post.