I listened to a podcast with the above title recently and i really liked it, it explained, how through researching and understanding our cPTSD (and i think PTSD too), we may come to think we have depression, anxiety, other problems....
We own this stuff, but in essense it isnt us, but has become us....which differs to a lot of other mental health problems
i felt it had a lot of truth for me, as i spent years treating depression, treating addiction, treating lack of assertiveness etc etc and doing courses, and books......but now understanding trauma and cPTSD, has been a load off, and makes me feel at ease somewhat
i think i am rambling, but thought i would share to see if it made sense to others
I havent posted the link, as i forget the rules for posting such items
thanks
'It isn't us' sounds about right.
Cptsd is a disorder arising from interpersonal trauma I think, so it doesn't happen without cause, and the cause is outside of us.
Needs remembering to fend off self blame.
Thank you both for sharing. It's hard to quite those inner critic. :'(
I find it hard to put the blame squarely where it belongs, too easy to blame myself as that is the narrative being put about.
I don't think that we blame ourselves as much as it is the fact that we were conditioned to accept responsibility, oftentimes even when it is not our fault st all.
You're so right Johnram - IT ISN'T US! Shouting b/c it's such an important message for us and those we deal with - CPTSD is really all about injuries inflicted on us at the hands of others. :yes:
You are welcome to post the link by the way.
Revisiting my old post
needed to be reminded of this just now
So sorry to hear this John. There's a book you might want to consider reading by Dr. Christine Courtois titled "It's Not You, It's What Happened to You". It really helped shift my thinking & feeling because she points readers back to the science behind trauma responses, and away from the personal weaknesses we and others, professionals included, think we're 'guilty' of.
https://www.amazon.ca/Its-Not-You-What-Happened/dp/1941536557.
Good one to have on the nightstand for if/when your thoughts start getting the better of you.
I hope you're able to give yourself the kindness and compassion you deserve, certainly I'm sending some along to you.
Thank you Kizzie
i have added it to my book list - it looks like i bought it before, but i dont recall (that happens often with me - too many unread books)
If i may recommend also - i read something similar by Dr Bruce Perry - called "what happened to you".
Note it has Oprah in dialogue with Bruce but its very good re trauma, and has some great stories
I've meant to buy that one and keep forgetting so thanks for the reminder :thumbup:
They are both very well known so imagine the fact that survivors develop developmental trauma/CPTSD in response to our abuse/neglect got a LOT of coverage and uptake. Let's hope so. Survivors need to hear the message as do professionals, families, the public, etc.
The experience of CPTSD symptoms is a *normal* response to *abnormal* events.
It is only when we are out of the danger zone and living our lives free from abuse that we are seen as having *abnormal* responses to *normal* events.
The abuse is the issue, not us.
It is not normal or healthy for people to abuse others.
Your brain has done the best job it knows how to keep you safe. Because the trauma was so intense and pervasive your brain now believes that it has to protect you from all of these external threats, even if they are no longer present.
Another couple of podcasts you may find helpful are:
- conversations with Carolyn Spring
- Trauma Rewired
Quote from: AnnaMaria on December 12, 2023, 10:05:16 AMThe experience of CPTSD symptoms is a *normal* response to *abnormal* events.
It is only when we are out of the danger zone and living our lives free from abuse that we are seen as having *abnormal* responses to *normal* events.
The abuse is the issue, not us.
It is not normal or healthy for people to abuse others.
This puts it so plainly. Thank you.
:yeahthat: :thumbup:
I like and appreciate this perspective. I'd love to listen to the podcast. Are you able to and comfortable with sharing a link to the content?
I have come to believe my cptsd is an injury brought on by abuse. Others did this to me.
I agree with the feelings expressed by others. In particular that it is a normal response to abnormal and damaging treatment.
For me, I think part of what took me so long to realise a problem exists at all, far less what that problem is or how it arose, is that my abuse has happened for as long as I can remember - probably since I was born. And generational trauma comes into the mix, too. So for me (and for many of us) there is no concept of "BC" (Before CPTSD) as opposed to "AD" (After the Damage). I have no experiential goal to strive for. In that sense, CPTSD is me - until I recognise it, repudiate it and start doing something about changing it.
I just watched Trauma Affects Hormones on the Trauma Conference. It underscored for me how much trauma is a BRAIN INJURY.
Repair to some degree or other is attainable. But it is an injury, and in lots of our cases on here it was done to us. Not that we were hit on the head necessarily but the constant stress, especially for those of us where it happened in early childhood meant that our system got hard-wired to fight-or-flight (which we all kind of know but there is a real medical term for this).
Thanks to past forum member Three Roses who reminded us of: it's a brain injury not a mental illness :)
From what I understand of the Trauma/Hormone session, some of the results of cptsd which most of us know so well could be termed mental illness and usually are, but underneath that it's physiological. This is the "normal response to abnormal events".
For anybody registered for the Trauma Superconference which ends today at midnight in your time zone, I can really recommend the Trauma/Hormone session.
I love how it separates cPTSD from who we are because sometimes it can be hard to remember this. Thank you for sharing!
Something incredibly hard for me is dealing with this constant and profound fear of others, particularly work situations. There are just so many things that my trauma totally limits me from doing. And the guilt is unbearable, I feel trapped and terrified, it's horrible. Thank you everyone for this thread, it has been very helpful. I'm listening to the Caroline Spring podcasts they are really great. The trauma conference looks interesting too but I don't know how to get access to it. But will try again next weekend as apparently it will be re-posted.