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Development of CPTSD in Childhood => Causes => General Discussion => Topic started by: sj on November 01, 2019, 09:01:57 AM

Title: Video - "The Capacity to Give up on People"
Post by: sj on November 01, 2019, 09:01:57 AM
Wasn't sure where to post this, so settled on this General Discussion part of the Child board because it illustrates quite well, both pictorially and in words, how the child mind translates abusive behaviour from care-givers.

It helps remind me and reinforce for me that my mind has been programmed to sell out on myself for the benefit of others who are toxic and that it is totally ok for me to WALK THE * AWAY from toxic people, family, friends or otherwise.

NC and LC are healthy, justifiable choices - I need to tell myself that a lot to quell the toxic shame and guilt.

Hope this is helpful for others, too.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VDKOY0ZTDPI
Title: Re: Video - "The Capacity to Give up on People"
Post by: Perplex on November 01, 2019, 09:45:34 AM
I like this point, about children automatically thinking that "No one and nothing else could be better". It feels even worse when your parents directly affirm that - shaming you for any wish for change.
The video has also reminded me of a rather toxic friendship I recently did 'walk away from'. I felt terrible for a while but, then you realise how better off you are and it feels freeing. I can give myself a pat on the back for that I guess.

Thanks for sharing.

Regards,
Complex.
Title: Re: Video - "The Capacity to Give up on People"
Post by: Kizzie on November 01, 2019, 03:21:05 PM
Great video sj  :thumbup:  So incredibly sad though to see what we went through psychologically to survive.   :'(  I tweeted a link to it because it captures the reasons we respond as we do (i.e., we have to to survive) quite well, why we hang onto the belief (wish) for years, decades even. 

Letting go of that wish was the hardest thing I ever did but it freed me to get on with recovery/healing. 

Title: Re: Video - "The Capacity to Give up on People"
Post by: Kizzie on November 01, 2019, 03:29:26 PM
I added the link under "Moving out/On; Going LC/NC" - https://cptsd.org/forum/index.php?topic=6846.new#new.