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Important Days/Holidays => Holidays & Other Important Days => Topic started by: Three Roses on November 20, 2019, 09:30:36 PM

Title: Opting out of Thanksgiving
Post by: Three Roses on November 20, 2019, 09:30:36 PM
Just not feelin' it this year. Not up to the whole cleaning, shopping, cooking, visiting thing. And what's more I don't feel bad, or guilty, or ashamed about it - I actually feel very positive. I've already told/texted everyone. I'm not even worried about the responses. This feels like progress.
Title: Re: Opting out of Thanksgiving
Post by: Blueberry on November 20, 2019, 10:54:04 PM
 :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: Sounds like progress and self-care to me!
Title: Re: Opting out of Thanksgiving
Post by: Perplex on November 21, 2019, 05:20:05 AM
Just not feelin' it this year. Not up to the whole cleaning, shopping, cooking, visiting thing. And what's more I don't feel bad, or guilty, or ashamed about it - I actually feel very positive. I've already told/texted everyone. I'm not even worried about the responses. This feels like progress.
That's great Three Roses. :) Taking self care to the highest level!
Title: Re: Opting out of Thanksgiving
Post by: Kizzie on November 21, 2019, 06:39:08 AM
 :thumbup:   and    :cheer:    and     :hug:    Sit back, relax and enjoy the lack of stress (and dishes)  :yes: 
Title: Re: Opting out of Thanksgiving
Post by: Snowdrop on November 21, 2019, 06:58:34 AM
Yes, great progress! :cheer:
Title: Re: Opting out of Thanksgiving
Post by: Three Roses on November 21, 2019, 09:34:27 AM
Thank you all.  :thumbup:

Interesting update - my husband virtually never answers texts or calls, so his family almost always calls me to make plans for Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc. SIL decided to call my h (her bro) on his bday last night. After wishing him a happy birthday, she started discussing Thanksgiving! She was attempting to manipulate him into letting her come and stay for a few days but just not have a big meal with everyone! And he seemed to be going along with it! He was joking with her, i.e., "no big meal but bring your own hot dogs" ...until I ran into the room waving my arms frantically, no no no! I mouthed, "I don't want her here!" I was soooo angry. She's very manipulative,  frequently changing her mind at the last minute after plans are made and expecting everyone to go along with her plans.

Well, h saw how angry I was, and where in the past he might have told me we'd just have to have her over to keep the peace, back peddled and said that we just couldn't have her here rn due to a lot of stress in our lives at the moment (which is true, there's stuff going on beyond our control rn).

I figured she was going to attempt this so I was prepared and held my ground. Hubby backed me up this time. I'm learning to say how I feel and what I want and need.  :thumbup:
Title: Re: Opting out of Thanksgiving
Post by: Snowdrop on November 21, 2019, 09:41:33 AM
Oh, that's brilliant! Deep progress. :applause:
Title: Re: Opting out of Thanksgiving
Post by: Blueberry on November 21, 2019, 12:56:10 PM
Way to go 3R!

:cheer: :cheer: :cheer:
Title: Re: Opting out of Thanksgiving
Post by: Kizzie on November 21, 2019, 08:19:14 PM
 :thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup:  Well done girlfriend!
Title: Re: Opting out of Thanksgiving
Post by: notalone on November 21, 2019, 10:23:47 PM
 :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: Excellent!
Title: Re: Opting out of Thanksgiving
Post by: Bach on November 22, 2019, 02:27:48 PM
Wow, great work!   :applause: :applause: :applause: Setting and keeping that boundary is tremendous.  I'm glad your husband backed you up, good for him.