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Welcome to OOTS - New Members Please Start Here => New Members => Introductory Post => Topic started by: greyling on August 16, 2015, 12:27:07 AM

Title: A friend in need
Post by: greyling on August 16, 2015, 12:27:07 AM
Hi, everyone. I'm posting here after having Googled "caring about someone with c ptsd" and poking around the boards, particularly "When Someone in Your Life has CPTSD." A close friend (with complicated history) of mine was officially diagnosed with C-PTSD last fall, although he'd been obviously unwell and getting worse before that, and I've been working to be supportive, but I've found that, because people struggle to understand what he's going through, they by extension struggle to understand the doubts/fears/etc. I have.

I'll probably lurk a lot, but I'm glad to have found you all.
Title: Re: A friend in need
Post by: mourningdove on August 16, 2015, 01:16:08 AM
Welcome, greyling!  :) I'm glad you are here and I hope you can find what you are looking for.
Title: Re: A friend in need
Post by: KayFly on August 16, 2015, 06:11:09 AM
Hey Greyling,

You are super sweet for going such lengths for your friend.  My boyfriend right now is reading "Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving" by Pete Walker, which is the main recommended book here (in case you had not heard). But just the fact that he is reading it and trying to understand where I am coming from and help me through, absolutely means the world to me.  And its proven to be effective, when I go into a bad state, that he can identify what is happening for me. :)

Very glad you are here as well.
Title: Re: A friend in need
Post by: woodsgnome on August 16, 2015, 02:58:11 PM
Lurking is probably more the norm here, actually; as the what/who/why of one's experience is hard enough. It's like a shock, and words to describe it are often very triggering as well.

When there's enough courage to venture a glance at what's here, one realizes there's a lot of oomph to the content. And a lot of tears behind the words, too.

It's pretty natural not to want to say much. This is raw emotion, and we live in a world that frowns on its expression. It's scary beyond words--which is exactly the fear I'm referring to.

Do I open that door and risk? Speaking for myself, I'm petrified I'll be judged; it was instilled early. The beauty here is that you can find a voice--there's no judgement that sets you apart as a bad person if you don't want to share, or it's just too awkward, or you stumble. It's a safe haven to visit when you can, or just want to, or have a pressing issue you need to check out--you can come when you need to, and your own experience is valued in turn.

Title: Re: A friend in need
Post by: KayFly on August 16, 2015, 03:01:16 PM