This is quite a strange topic to start, but I "think" I'm starting to feel better. All my flashbacks have stopped, the negative thoughts have disappeared, I'm sleeping better than I have done in months, I feel like I'm ready to move on-or am I?
I've been waiting for months now without any help on a waiting list for EMDR and a trauma therapist, I feel like my brain has said right enough is enough you're not waiting anymore, just move on with your life like you know you can. I've pushed all the negative thoughts and bad feelings away and feel like I've just got to move on and can't let this cptsd hold me back anymore. Trouble is, I really don't know how I'm managing to do this especially without any help or support, could I be just so fed up that I've managed to swallow it all and feel ready to move on, is it likely to come back again at some point? I'm almost scared to think I should move on and keep looking for reasons/feelings to say I shouldn't, should I still have EMDR or say I dont want it now? I find this really strange that I feel like this now, a few weeks ago I was a complete mess but now feel I'm over it, or am I likely to crash again. Really not sure of my thought pattern at the moment!
I get intervals when it seems my system has just had enough and decides it's taking a break. During these times my mood is elevated, I feel somewhat social, and I have a ton of energy. This is when all the deep cleaning gets done! ;)
Three Roses, this is exactly how I feel! Suddenly feel like I have an abundance Of energy and I'm about to change the world! It feels weird!