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Hey Y'all

I'm wedding planning for an August wedding, and I'm struggling to keep boundaries with my BPD mom, who is not so secretly making my day about herself. She even chose my wedding dress, which is pretty, but also not what I wanted. I'm not so sure what to do with setting boundaries with her. Has anyone else done wedding planning with a BPD mom? What was it like for you? What worked well for you? Honestly looking for any advice y'all can give me!

Peace,
Rose

Hi! I'm Rose (She/they), and I'm a 25yo childhood abuse survivor.
I'm a seminarian, studying to become a parish minister, and excitingly, I'm getting married this year! I'm here because I have an alcoholic father and mother diagnosed with BPD, and wedding planning has been difficult, so I'm glad to have found a community that is focused on healing.

I've been living away from my family for a few years now, but not at the point of being able to go no contact for safety reasons, but I am working towards it. I've been in therapy and different mental health programs for around 10 years now, and I'm starting to get exhausted in my healing journey. I have a few very supportive friends, and my in-laws are incredible, but they don't understand C-ptsd in the same way, so I'm exciting to make connections and learn about healing from you all!

Peace,
Rose