Hello, I'm new here. I was diagnosed with C-PTSD last year. I will share part of my story here, and my hope is someone can either give me advice, or just if they have been dealing with something similar.
TLDR: I am entering a new relationship with someone, but I don't feel my C-PTSD has been resolved and I want to really work on it this time.
So I dated a guy back in January 2023. He had told me he was single for four years because he wanted to work on himself and be the best partner to whoever he decided to settle down with. We had a very whirlwind romance. We fell for each other really fast, or at least I thought we did. He said everything I wanted to hear and after coming from a very toxic relationship before him, it was very meaningful that he wanted to do all these things for me and take care of me. Things started to go downhill very fast. He wanted to dictate every aspect of my life, and he would pick arguments with me quite often. If he got me to my breaking point, I would either shut down, or I would cry hysterically. One point, it got so bad that I threw my phone through my window. After dealing with that relationship for a few months, I broke things off with him and was in therapy for a bit to try to work things out. I later found out that he had cheated on me, which I think increased the symptoms I had of my C-PTSD, in terms of not feeling good enough.
I entered a new relationship about 6 months later, and I discontinued therapy because I felt like all my symptoms had been resolved. But whenever this new person and I had arguments, it would again have a similar pattern. We didn't have arguments as often, but when we did, they were BAD. I had a similar situation during our last fight where I screamed at him. After a while, it felt like I just did whatever he wanted in order to keep the peace in the relationship so I ended that one as well.
Finally, I'm in a new relationship with someone I was in love with about 10 years ago. We've both grown a lot since then, but I am noticing my symptoms of PTSD coming back really bad. I feel like I'm not good enough, I have a lot of negative thoughts about myself, and I don't want it to affect this relationship because I really do care about him, and I want to make sure I'm in a healthy place not only for the sake of the relationship, but because I don't want to feel this negatively about myself anymore. I want to be able to be confident in myself, whether I am with someone or not. If you read all of this, thank you, and I'd love to hear any advice you may have.
TLDR: I am entering a new relationship with someone, but I don't feel my C-PTSD has been resolved and I want to really work on it this time.
So I dated a guy back in January 2023. He had told me he was single for four years because he wanted to work on himself and be the best partner to whoever he decided to settle down with. We had a very whirlwind romance. We fell for each other really fast, or at least I thought we did. He said everything I wanted to hear and after coming from a very toxic relationship before him, it was very meaningful that he wanted to do all these things for me and take care of me. Things started to go downhill very fast. He wanted to dictate every aspect of my life, and he would pick arguments with me quite often. If he got me to my breaking point, I would either shut down, or I would cry hysterically. One point, it got so bad that I threw my phone through my window. After dealing with that relationship for a few months, I broke things off with him and was in therapy for a bit to try to work things out. I later found out that he had cheated on me, which I think increased the symptoms I had of my C-PTSD, in terms of not feeling good enough.
I entered a new relationship about 6 months later, and I discontinued therapy because I felt like all my symptoms had been resolved. But whenever this new person and I had arguments, it would again have a similar pattern. We didn't have arguments as often, but when we did, they were BAD. I had a similar situation during our last fight where I screamed at him. After a while, it felt like I just did whatever he wanted in order to keep the peace in the relationship so I ended that one as well.
Finally, I'm in a new relationship with someone I was in love with about 10 years ago. We've both grown a lot since then, but I am noticing my symptoms of PTSD coming back really bad. I feel like I'm not good enough, I have a lot of negative thoughts about myself, and I don't want it to affect this relationship because I really do care about him, and I want to make sure I'm in a healthy place not only for the sake of the relationship, but because I don't want to feel this negatively about myself anymore. I want to be able to be confident in myself, whether I am with someone or not. If you read all of this, thank you, and I'd love to hear any advice you may have.