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I was diagnosed with PTSD at 17 because of an abusive step-father and was told then that this was something I would likely be dealing with in some way my whole life. I'm 50 now, been in a good relationship for 20 years, have great kids that got to have the childhood I never had - I never passed it on or became what I hate. But, yep! It still is something I often have to deal with. It still comes back and a lot of the time I don't even see it coming. I just spent a couple of years trying to help my mother and unleashed a whole new round of it. And I can't tell you how many times I've heard, "Aren't you over that by now?  Let it go." Let's just say that I've heard it enough, I seldom talk about it. Only being with my mother and having so many triggers the last couple of years, and realizing that maybe it wasn't just my step-father I had to with, where I'm back to the whole sleeplessness vs. nightmares cycle, anxiety, crying fits, etc. has me talking about it at all. But what I've come to tell those people who do know and so clearly don't understand and seem to think this is something people just get over is: "You don't understand - and you should thank God you don't and pray you never do. If you can't help or at least empathize, then at the very least, don't cause more hurt with your callousness. I tried to trust you enough to be honest - my mistake. It won't happen again."

I can't say that I've ever taken my personal safety for granted; not that I'm concerned about anyone in my life now hurting me, but I just don't take it for granted. What the people in Orlando have suffered is atrocious. My thoughts and prayers go out to those killed or injured and to their families. It angers me that so much of the shooter's actions are being perceived as being about a religion. This dismissive labeling leaves the much bigger issue of the shooter's mental illness left unaddressed. To my mind, of course these kind of control freak people are going to respond to these kind of terror groups. I'm neither gay nor Muslim, but from my point of view, the real issue is that this person was seriously and obviously mentally ill. Today, I read an interesting article on the correlations and patterns of thinking and behavior between domestic violence and mass shooters in the New York Times. The only thing that troubles me about it is that the perspective seems to be that only women are abused and men are always the abusers. In spite of my own history, where I was diagnosed with PTSD when I was 17, and "due tot the ages and stages" I acquired it, it has been something I've had to deal with in some way my whole life - I recognize that abuse isn't gender-specific and this perception of it leaves men in a very bad position. Granted women, being smaller, have other ways of being abusive than sheer brute force, although some are physically abusive, too - some women have the same control freak mindset. Women can be abusive, too. Nobody gets to tell them no and everybody is going to do what they want or else. And if society doesn't start recognizing the mindset and behavior regardless of gender (or social position, etc.,) how are we ever going to end this? How are we ever going to get a mental health system that can actively heal or help both the abused and the abusers? How else are we going to end it? Here's the article that I'm talking about. http://www.nytimes.com/2016/06/16/world/americas/control-and-fear-what-mass-killings-and-domestic-violence-have-in-common.html?src=mv&_r=0

Hello, everyone- I removed my last post because I think I answered my own question. So now I just want to say I'm so glad to learn about this group. For the first time, I think there really are others who understand.