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I too am an HSP. I  was lucky to have found a great HSP board, this was 11 years ago and I  learnt a lot about myself.  I also met my H who I thought was an HSP too but turned out eventually that he was ASD.

I miss driving as I used to back home (UK).  No  I don't hurt anyone, its not my thing and acting like a child which i didn't realise has pretty much passed, though sometimes my voice will change. Thanks for the support, its appreciated 

Trust ? whats that ..... yes i have a hard time trusting.

As regards food when I have trouble eating I drink a diet protein drink and that keeps me going, not sure if it would help but it does for me as I am a very picky eater 

Three Roses I often give my kids hugs, I see them sitting on my lap and I wrap my arms around me  and I tell them how much I love them. It helps me and them as love is a wonderful giving thing 

I never had children as the abuse affected me badly, making me believe that I would do bad things to any child of mine.....

Compassion is a great thing to have and I am learning to take care of myself and LOVE myself, the whole of me.

I can get very anxious and depressed at times but I use natural supplements that have helped more then anything from any Dr.  I don't like see like seeing Dr's as I hate feeling invaded .....  I also practice gratefulness as it can be too easy to forget the good things in life and that can help me a lot too.

Our kids took what we couldn't , so yes I believe they take care of me as I do them.

Sometimes they get pesky as they don't understand my husband very well, he is ASD, so him and my kids can have blow ups, but I know  that they are looking after me as I do them

The more in touch I get with them more I learn from them.

"How do I be an adult right now, when my body and brain feel like a child taking on way more than I know how to deal with?"

I understand all too well when one feels like a child. Is it worth it telling your boss that sometimes you don't feel so great without revealing the problem

Do you talk with your inner kids, I do often and I find it helps  as sometimes I can find out what they are thinking and feeling. Not sure if this will help you but it helps me. I so love communication as one can learn so much from another. It sounds like your kids are overwhelmed and that can make for unhappy times, not just for them but for you too.  I get overwhelmed on a regular basis and I am trying to teach my kids some simple boundaries.

In my head we all live in a BIG house where everyone has a room where they can be on their own if they wish. I have a large room in the middle of the  house that is mine and I am teaching them, albeit slowly that when my door is shut that means I want/need peace and quiet. If they really need me they may ask if they can come see me.

I wish you all the best, i know it's not easy.

I love to be out, though not all the time. My H works long hours so I spend too much time on my own.  The complex where we live is on a steep hill and I am unable to walk up it as my knees aren't that great.  So I feel trapped here, especially when my husband doesn't want to take me out.

Thank goodness for my dogs as they are great company. I find it hard though walking them as they can bark , though that's all they do, but it draws attention to me which I don't like.

I am a private person and though friendly I don't open up much though I do more here as I know people will understand.

I have wondered too if I had DID as not only my ex but my husband too saw how I changed and I know others saw it too, that I would act and talk like a child. I can still dissociate pretty heavily at times, hence I don't drive. My voice no longer changes, at least I don't think so.... but I am so used to how I sound.

My Husband said I was DID Light and maybe I was but looking back I wonder ? My husband knows when my kids are out as their behaviour is very different from mine.

I wished now I had gone to see a DID therapist but somehow my husband persuaded me not too.

I remember one time with my ex I was looking at toys and he said I looked and acted like a child. I thought I was just been me but I wasn't.

It has taken me several hours before it hit me, i was in an emotional  Flashback and the strength of it knocked my socks off.... though not literally 

Thank you Three Roses, your kind words help so much. I hope I wont be flashing back for a while, but at least I will understand if it happens again.

I have been in touch with my Kids inside, but especially the  4 year old child that was me. Today was overwhelming and TBH I felt as though I was losing it with all that she gave me. I know its good as I want to learn, but the pain that my inner child went through just felt so bad that I wanted to run away and hide.

Here I can talk about the pain as this is a safe place but to be, face to face with another person I think I would have crumpled.

My mum said I had invisible friends when I was 4 years old  as I would talk with them a lot. As I embrace my past I knew that in many ways they were my friends, friends who protected me till I felt able to feel and today I sure did feel and I felt I was going stir crazy. I know there is more to come up and have known for a long time, I just didn't expect the depth of pain I felt.

If you have read this then I thank you for listening to me, it means a lot to me to be heard.....

Hi Lilibuth12 and welcome, this is a good place to be and learn.

Kizzie I just found this post of yours and what Walker recommended and TBH it bought me to tears, I certainly didn't expect that to happen.

I am often in touch with my inner Children and I am aware that my husband has some traits that my dad who was my abuser had. he died when i was 18 so i never got to know why he did what he did   

I didn't choose my husband though at the time i thought I had, it was my kids who made the choice, hence me been in the US.

Thank you for your post  Kizzie you have given me more to think about....

Lana I understand about feeling lonely, though I am married.  I am adjusting to the feelings of loneliness and my 2 dogs help me a lot. I have some pretty good conversation with them and they get me out of the apt walking.

I am learning to take care of me and in a strange way that helps me feel less lonely. Is there anything you enjoy doing, indoors or out or how about on-line friends ?

How about a pet would that help  ? I spend a lot of time on my own and having someone who looks at me with love and I believe listens, sure helps me  better (my dogs that is)  if wanted.

Thank you Three Roses for the  and I agree it doesn't excuse how he treated me. I think that is that is the worse I have seen him and if it gets worse I will have to get out, though with no money I have no idea how I will do it, but will X that bridge when I come to it...

Its fathers Day as I believe most of you will know that.

My husband decided to go see his dad today, and I know he never feels comfortable about been around him and so I didn't understand why he wanted to go.

Apparently he arranged it all and then told me I was going. I didn't feel comfortable either as we have 2 dogs and his dad is NOT a dog person. I told my H I wouldn't be going. Yesterday I could tell he was NOT happy as I needed food , but he wouldn't take me to get some. I don't drive and no shop is near enough for me to walk.

Anyway I knew that he was upset as he doesn't handle his emotions well, but today he did something that hurt me so badly. He started to taunt me about my inner kids in a really unpleasant way. I told him to stop but he just kept going. I know he is screwed up about seeing his dad but it was his choice, he made all the arrangements and then expected me to come.

I feel so much hurt inside as last night I was working on things with my inner Kids trying to put boundaries down etc and things were going well. Obviously he had a meltdown and the emotional attack on me was horrible, It will take time to get over it.

He can have a go at me, I can take it, but the way he attacked my inner kids was just too much for me. I have said often about a divorce but he wont go there, though if he is that unhappy why wont he let me go ?