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Healingjourney, I totally understand and emphasize with what you saying, I have read read the book by Dr Cloud on boundaries and I got allot out of it.  What you have added there is like an extension of my words. 

Last night was so heavily emotionally painful, the pain is of emotional flashbacks, that I just couldn't find any rest or peace, all that I could think of was the loss of friends, I was experiencing extreme tremors throughout my body and felt the anguish of just not coping with this time that I can't do anything about, but trying to find a means to push on regardless of how I feel.  It was just so intense with the feeling of abandonment n rejection.

Thankyou Whobuddy for the info on the book, I haven't read it before but will get it and read it for sure, I'm also really glad to hear that yoga has worked for you, cos I'm about to start it. 

Has anyone found that with this disorder that the stress and anxiety is hard to keep low, that other people don't feel impacted by it

One of my biggest struggles with this disorder is that because of what happened to me a child through extreme trauma of 11 years from birth, I am having to go through the redevelopment process again, one of the developing areas is finding my identity, in who I am and what my values, boundaries, morals, interests and likes and dislikes are, having to reconnect the mind to the body and also finding a way to lower the extreme stress and anxiety and breaking out of social isolation and being able to communicate in such a way that isn't so heavy.  The other thing is that I have major trust issues and have no idea what love is or what all the different emotional feelings are, general feelings and body language being able to read a persons out look, like there is so many things that to relearn and rewire the brain.  Yes I am getting there bit by bit but it has taken me a long while to start being able to feel safe enough to venture out again, even though I often feel as though there is a solid wall sitting right in my path.  I have been in the dumps for the last few months only to get to this point in being this far ready to try something like Yoga to help me learn how to manage allot of areas like stress and anxiety, to loosen this rigid stiff body.

Has anybody else come across this state in Complex PTSD?