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I have been working very hard on therapy. I was abused by my maternal grandmother,my mother, and bullied by my younger sister. There was sexual abuse by mother and a few men she knew. This caused me to be afraid of "relations" with men, like, I didn't have heterosexual sex until last August at 50. But,anyways..... I want to have a healthy relationship someday and that is one of my goals.

I can't help feeling less than. My therapist has and does tell me I am smart and likeable. I just don't believe it. He even encouraged me to take an IQ test just to see how I would do. (130) LOL. I feel I am too old, too broken, too much wrong with me. When I am told I'm pretty I doubt it. Is there any hope.?

TW
I am a 50 year old woman. My M molested me among other things. I feel that she failed me and didn't do her best in raising me. My therapist wants me to rewrite my past and I know this will come up. It seems like this is said in a lot of self help books, that the abusers and other adults did their  best. I just don't see it that way. Am I wrong thinking that she did not do her best?

Thanks everybody.  It has been a tough week at work. I have been dealing with a bully and no matter how many times I told her she was hurting me with what she was saying it wouldn't stop. I lost my temper yesterday and got in trouble for it. The supervisor keep yelling at me and would not listen. People just don't want to listen to me.

I don't feel that I have very much support. I'm n/c with my mother and sister not they cared anything about me. And because of my mother and sister extended family won't have anything to do with me. my family is not very big. I have never been able to make friends and feel like so far behind othees. I also am hard of hearing since birth. I go to church but don't seem to get much support there. I think I am going through a crisis of faith right now.
It just seems like others avoid me when I get very depressed. This current relapse of depression has been going on for over six Months now. My PCP referred me to a psychiatrist as my dr was not able to find the right meds.
Anyways I feel like an outsider most of the time.  I don't have anything in common with anyone. And I work so much. It hurts that I don't even get a text msg asking how I am.  I don't know much I want so bad to fit in and be accepted but I don't know how. I know I share to much I think it might be for sympathy. But I really am hurting. I feel like I am such a bother and so needy.  I have been thinking how unfair my life has been.  My family have always put me down for not succeeding when it is their doing that I am So screwed up.

Just formally diagnosed at 48yo and feeling overwhelmed. after reading some I feel a little anxious and scared. I have spent most of my life isolated except for a relationship for eleven years until she cheated on me. I am gay. Now I am wondering if will ever have friends or another relationship. 
I guess my desire is to be "normal" but why is it hard to be alone without friends when this has been a life long problem. I am also feeling hurt and angry at my FOO all of this. My mother caused so much trouble that I am not liked either. But I have always felt like an outsider.

Just diagnosed at 48yo. Have always had problems with depression and anxiety. I guess now I know why. A therapist mentioned it a few years ago. January I became really depressed and PCP tried for months to treat me but nothing was working. Have seeing a licensed social worker. Thus past Thursday saw a psychiatrist to help with meds and he asked questions and that was that. Being diagnosed with PTSD had knocked the wind out of my sails to say the least.
Molested by mother,her boyfriend and boy in neighborhood. Mother maybe has/had a personality disorder. In NC with mother and sister. I am the o!der but treated like the youngest. Was also bullied a lot and my sister helped with that. I was looked down upon for not doing drugs,not drinking and not being promiscuous. I was ignored and treated badly because of them. They got all the attention. I am thinking my abuse was worse than I thought. Some things I can't remember.
I am feeling very scared and just in shock. I have to keep working while dealing with this.