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Messages - rosierhodes

#1
Other / Re: sound
July 26, 2016, 12:51:22 AM
Thank you for welcoming me.  No it's not a ringing, it's a constant pattern of sound from my brain, it's not from the outside, that gets worse when i am very anxious and only if I am extremely distracted I wont notice it.  Like for instance, if I am playing with my grandchildren, I won't notice it. I notice it at work, at home and anytime I am not distracted.  Sometimes I do my housework to the sound of it because it is like being plugged in to energy.  I am thinking it might be a type of disassociation.  Thank you for responding to my question.....I was married to a sociopath for several years and I was always in fear of my life and the life of my pets and before him to an alcoholic who was not as intelligent as the sociopath but did psychological harm to me.  The sociopath was a trained counselor and he knew how to manipulate my emotions to the point of extreme fear.
#2
I take a very very long time to trust someone and then I might not even trust them completely.  I seem to not have the skills to tell if someone is ok or not so I withdraw into my own world where I feel safest.  I am married and even stay away from my husband because sometimes the smallest things he might say will make me put up my guard and I at my limit of what I can tolerate.  I can be fake friendly with people I don't know but I don't want to get very close to anyone anymore.  My boundaries are probably unhealthy but I do what I have to in order to protect myself.
#3
Other / sound
July 23, 2016, 11:49:20 AM
Do any of you hear a constant sound...repeating sound....that is caused by anxiety in your head?