Messages

I've always told myself it's a mistake to assume everyone is like you, just as it's a mistake to assume nobody is like you.    But I really thought, deep down, I was very much alone in my story of physical, emotional, and sexual abuse, abandonment, and circumstances so bizarre, I feel like if my life were a painting, the curator would hang it in the basement, behind the water heater.  I've never been part of a support group before.  I was diagnosed with bipolar II disorder, but never felt like the nail was hit squarely on the head with with that diagnosis.  Then my sister (a fellow victim) told me about C-PTSD, and sent me here.  When I started reading some of your stories, it was like opening the curtain and lifting the blind.  Holy smack-down, Batman!  I had no idea how many others there were.  That's where the "Thank You" comes from, deep down from my heart, for being strong enough to haul up a heavy bucket of pain and pour it out so willingly for others to see.  Though it's illogical, and, in a way very tragic, it is helpful to know others can relate to me and what happened at "home" (if it be fair to call it that).  A home is supposed to be a safe, comforting, nurturing space; a place to keep you safe from the bullies and perverts "out there."  It's a personal holocaust to realize that when you step off the school bus, the house of horrors is inside, not outside, and it's a long night ahead.  God, that makes me sad to say.  So, just THANKS for being here.

sooo NOT stupid.