Vanilla,
I resonated with your post. Facing the reality and the emotions of not being loved by, in my case, uNPD mum/family system. All that comes from that one reality. It was not a family, I was not loved and on top of that, the abuse fed their parasitic nature. I had to sit with all that, cry, scream, mope, trudge, punch pillows, everything. For years. NC, for me, is essential for healing the trauma bond and all that comes with having been raised in a NPD/Sociopathic family system. I don't know if this helps. I hope so.
I resonated with your post. Facing the reality and the emotions of not being loved by, in my case, uNPD mum/family system. All that comes from that one reality. It was not a family, I was not loved and on top of that, the abuse fed their parasitic nature. I had to sit with all that, cry, scream, mope, trudge, punch pillows, everything. For years. NC, for me, is essential for healing the trauma bond and all that comes with having been raised in a NPD/Sociopathic family system. I don't know if this helps. I hope so.