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I feel like I can't get better. I watch everyone around me laughing and living but then there I am. I feel so different than everyone around me and I know they are sick of me not getting better. I keep trying to tell myself that dealing with CPTSD is a long and hard process and that I am doing the best that I can but I feel like it's never good enough. That and living with my narcissist mother who is the cause of my CPTSD makes recovery that much harder. I'm feeling so miserable. Thank you to everyone posting on this site. It makes me feel less crazy and less alone. 

I relate to a lot of this. My mom was extremely emotionally abusive but I never saw it until I started going to therapy a year ago. My therapist brought up the word abuse and I immediately started to deny it, almost like I was trying to defend my mother. My therapist has also brought up that she thinks I have CPTSD (She can't formally diagnose me because she isn't a doctor but she is quite certain.) Looking back at my childhood and how I am now as a young adult I know that it was (and still continues to be) abuse. Lately I have really been struggling with that diagnosis. I go back and forth telling myself I have CPTSD and I need to start healing to telling myself I'm being over dramatic. I most of the time can't even begin to put into words how I feel but this is my first time to this site so this will have to be my start.

Thank you for sharing your experience and I am truly sorry you had to deal with this. I know it is complete *.