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yes!! my work does offer an employee family assistance program where they cover a certain amount of sessions with a therapist.  With this letter, I am hoping my work will extend my sessions considering my therapy is long term   i also got my GP to write a letter that she recommends long term therapy for me as well.  Fingers crossed!  Its very different in this province than it is back home.  Back home psychiatrists offer psychotherapy as well as perscribing medication, diagnosing, etc etc.  So if I saw a psychiatrist back home, it would be completely covered under the health care plan, here, psychiatrists ONLY prescribe medication and do diagnoses, so I am on my own to find and pay for therapy that my work wont cover under my insurance. smh

I got into work today and received an email that this week is "Disability Awareness Week" so I was reading it and was surprised to discover that there is an "invisible disability" section.  This is what it said:

"To define invisible disability in simple terms is a physical, mental or neurological condition that limits a person's movements, senses, or activities that is invisible to the onlooker.  Whether it be mental illness, a learning disorder, a chronic condition like rheumatoid arthritis, or even an addiction. "

Just food for thought on this snowy Tuesday morning.  I went and saw my psychiatrist yesterday and he "officially" diagnosed me with CPTSD, and wrote me a letter that i can give to work. So that made me extremely happy.

I did, thank you Blueberry, it was a relief to read that, and yes, I have been able to find peace at work, i also have someone I can talk to via text during the day and he is my anchor and helps to bring me back to present.

Absolutely! I find that my steps quicken and my movements are almost jerky when this happens.  i have to force myself to slow down, and be more aware of my surroundings, in a peaceful way.

Oh wow, that caused a HUGE trigger response, but its okay, I had no idea it would.  But ALL of #6 just resonanted in me, and made me flash back to what my mother did, and my ex husband.  My whole life I prided myself on my memory, I have always had an excellent memory, but my mother would tell me that i was making it up, or lying, or just using excuses, and my ex husband did exactly the same thing.  Sitting here at work, tears threatening....

Yes, PeTe, thats the question I struggle with everyday and the book I got, its called The Book About Me, and its  been very helpful.  It asks the simple questions, such as whats my favourite colour, when is my favourite time of year, whats my clothing style, etc etc.  I am very much enjoying discovering "the real true me" and the book will be a keepsake for years to come, and a reference if I ever feel I need to validate anything.
On a side note, my mother was also BPD, as well as what was once called manic depressive...

awwww thanks you guys! I have been searching on amazon for some "about me" books where you answer questions about yourself everyday for a year, etc. Hoping that helps!

Good morning everyone,
I have been lurking a while here, but am struggling with something new lately.  In a conversation with a friend, I let it out that I have been having a hard time with "who I am" versus "who everyone else expects me to be"  Years upon years of being who I was supposed to be so they would love me, be happy, not abandon me, has left me with a loss of self.  Being the perfect daughter did not stop my mother from abusing me horrendously for my entire childhood, being the perfect wife did not stop my husband from being viciously cruel towards me during my brief marriage.  So now, I am safe, and alone, happily alone, but lost.  Who am I supposed to be if theres no one that "needs" me to act a certain way?