I'm new and more than a little terrified. Yes. Yes, it was, well one of them. There's...a lot.
I know the egg donor didn't want children.
She had cats which she cleaned up after (toxoplasmosis), smoked cigs, drank, all through the pregnancy. I remember being in the womb...hearing muffled, angry voices...
She went back to work a few days after my birth, left me with my dad (and honestly I don't even know if he really is my dad...I'll leave it at that) whom she basically made quit his job and give up his drivers license...
They kept me high chair bound, in diapers, till I was five.
Neglect. I remember being in that awful high chair...begging to go to the bathroom because I was sick, vomiting everywhere, my dad laughing hysterically.
The great aunt egg donor cared for, had alzheimers...she was violent too. Egg donor said that the great aunt tried to drown me when I was two or three...why didn't she stop her great aunt.
I didn't learn to swim, due to paralysing fear...until I was 27. (I taught myself, thanks to studying the mammalian diving reflex...)
When I was 20 the egg donor told me she regretted not getting an abortion, when I was 10 she lost custody to another family member (ANOTHER source of great pain, another abuser....my family is full of personality disordered, cruel and psychotic women).
She never cared. The wound began in utero. She had cats, drank, smoked...because she didn't want me.
I know the egg donor didn't want children.
She had cats which she cleaned up after (toxoplasmosis), smoked cigs, drank, all through the pregnancy. I remember being in the womb...hearing muffled, angry voices...
She went back to work a few days after my birth, left me with my dad (and honestly I don't even know if he really is my dad...I'll leave it at that) whom she basically made quit his job and give up his drivers license...
They kept me high chair bound, in diapers, till I was five.
Neglect. I remember being in that awful high chair...begging to go to the bathroom because I was sick, vomiting everywhere, my dad laughing hysterically.
The great aunt egg donor cared for, had alzheimers...she was violent too. Egg donor said that the great aunt tried to drown me when I was two or three...why didn't she stop her great aunt.
I didn't learn to swim, due to paralysing fear...until I was 27. (I taught myself, thanks to studying the mammalian diving reflex...)
When I was 20 the egg donor told me she regretted not getting an abortion, when I was 10 she lost custody to another family member (ANOTHER source of great pain, another abuser....my family is full of personality disordered, cruel and psychotic women).
She never cared. The wound began in utero. She had cats, drank, smoked...because she didn't want me.