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Shattered,
I too am new here. Although I had different traumas during my time in the military, my symptoms are similar. I struggled with Bulimia for 10 years and was finally able to manage it after several inpatient centers but have lately struggled with relapse. Something we always have to be vigilant about. I also had my significant other (and his brother who was living with us at the time) make fun of me and mimic me. Mainly my cutting, when I was in despair and my most desperate time. How can people be so cruel and without compassion? C-PTSD can be truly terrifying and overwhelming. All those intense emotions, feeling like you are going crazy, and it all seems never ending. I isolate myself because I don't want anyone to see me like this, or to have my behavior affect them, but at the same time desperately need people. I wish I could tell you something that's worked for me but I haven't found anything (healthy at least) yet. I hope you find the support you need here, and know you're not alone.

Thank you for the support, and the VA has taken good care of me. Well, as good as they can. I've been treated outside the VA for 5 yrs after my discharge for PTSD and Bulimia and for 5 yrs by the VA once my claim was approved in 2010. Some of their therapy has worsened my C-PTSD because they don't know how treatment needs to be different. I'm lucky they haven't diagnosed me with a personality disorder and only say BPD tendencies or DPD tendencies. The VA doesn't cover personality disorders as connection to military service. I hope eventually C-PTSD will be included in the DSM.

Hello, I'm a 30 yr old female Air Force Veteran. I'm 100% disabled by the VA for PTSD. I suffered 2 rapes while in tech school. The first I had just turned 18 2 weeks prior and was assaulted by my 30 yr old superior. I was a virgin. The 2nd was exactly a month later by a drunk "friend".
When I got to Minot AFB where I was stationed, my job was to deploy out to the missile fields for 4 days at a time. I lived there with a bunch of male cops. I was the only female usually in 8. Sometimes more. My job at the Missile Alert Facility (MAF) was a Missile Chef. I basically ran my own restaurant. I did the ordering, receiving, cooking, cleaning, maintenance and accounting. My immediate superior was the Facility Manager (FM) and I was his partner with the maintenance duties as well. The MAF had a living room, computer room, billiard room and gym. The FM and I each had our own room. The cops had to share. Since for the most part I was the only female I was repeatedly sexually harassed. I isolated myself when I could to my room when I wasn't working but for the most part just had to tolerate it. I developed bulimia to deal with my assaults while in tech school. I was in "therapy" for it but as I only had 2 days off in between deployments it wasn't much help. I never told about my assaults. For 3 yrs I begged to be taken from the missile fields, so I could have a normal job on base. My schedule was out for 4 days, off for 2 so making appointments was next to impossible. One time the relieving chef was delayed (the site is 4 hrs away from base and to get to it you have to drive in North Dakota blizzards). I missed my  Drs appointment and had a nervous breakdown when she arrived. Crying and saying I wanted to die. My commander was worried and took me out of the field for a month. I worked in the office during that time so I could make my appointments but that ended because we had such a shortage of Missile Chefs. I had no choice but to go out. If I refused I would go to jail. I had breakdowns before; I developed extreme anxiety about traveling out to the fields and leaving the safety of my room out there to be repeatedly harassed. I tried to have them in private but one time was so hysterical I had to lock up the whole kitchen and cook and push food out of a 2 inch opening under the metal shade pulled down over the counter. Unless you were on death's door you did your job. You're not sick unless they tell you you're sick. So you did your job between dashing to the latrine to throw up from a stomach virus, or through broken ribs. I think this is how my C-PTSD ddeveloped. I was forced to travel out despite my anxiety and constant harassment. I had no choice. I was trapped. I had put in orders for other bases but didn't know that because of my bulimia I had a medical profile that prohibited it. After 3 yrs 3 months in the Air Force they medically discharged me. I fought it, because all I wanted was to have a job on base with set hours and days off. I was very good at my job and was the youngest and only airman in my squadron to get Professional Performer on two Nuclear Surety Inspections. My commander fought to keep me in but I lost. Maybe it was for the best, but the military was my identity.