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Thank you all for the support. Feeling  better today, I think it is because I was able to vent it with people who understand. I do plan to speak with him next time bc he has been my doc for several years and I have always been up front about having C-PTSD. So he was either humoring me  or just not listening. Thanks again!

I'm grateful that this board is here tonight. I went to my primary physician today and I explained that I am struggling with anxiety and wanted to go back on medication. I have come very far in my healing but I'm just figuring out that I can't cure my C-PTSD. I can however manage my symptoms which explains asking my doc for medication. I have a long standing relationship with him and we have discussed the childhood sexual abuse on several occasions......like 2 years ago when he gave me medication for anxiety. Today however I explained I had a flare up of symptoms and I'm struggling with sleeping and being irritable and intrusive thoughts. And he said....and I quote ".but it happened so long ago...and you're a counselor can't you work your way through it" .I explained I have a therapist and I have been working at this a long time. He agreed to give me medication and stated he was "comfortable giving psych meds provided I don't do anything stupid" .I assured him I was not suicidal. I am just stunned that this was a conversation with a medical professional in 2014....I am just grateful I am not at the beginning of this process, I'm so so much stronger now and still his words hurt. I have to go back in two weeks and I am hoping I can say all the things I wanted to say today but shut down before I could get them out. Thanks for giving me a place to share this with people who understand.

Hi I'm maggie jay and I am very happy to have come across OOTS. I have spent years trying to heal from C-PTSD. Life is much better today than when I started my journey but the struggles linger. I keep looking for the finish line but can't seem to find  it. Thanks for being here.