Messages

Thank you for taking time to read this. I don't know who the baddies and the goodies are anymore. I have been raised in a church environment in which things were always sin/pure, light/dark...Church family were Christs representation...people outside of hearing the message of God were dangerous and not to be trusted. Within the four walls that was the safety.....now I am having visions of violence within my christian family home, a family that was looked up to as an example. I don't know how to deal with the darkness being where I was told there was light...and more emotional support coming from the people who I'm not supposed to get close to. Does anyone understand?

I'm a mixture of golden child, problem child and lost child.

I'm not sure that I can give fill examples because childhood is blurry..but can anyone else understand the weirdness of being the kid in which the focus of the family revolves around and yet at the same time ignored. I'm not sure I can get my head around feeling so both controlled and left to it? I can't work out if I'm coming or going.