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My sister has borderline and...

She is honestly starting to scare me. The way she looks at me with those eyes and stomps around the house. The way she is 30 and talks to my parents as if she is their little baby. The way she kisses me on the head before she leaves and treats me like a baby even though I am 21. I swear, ever since she has been visiting for the summer (she is a professor so she has summers off) I have been on edge, because I am waiting for the moment that she snaps, goes hysterical, or blames me for something I didn't do. It's making me really depressed, like I have a hard time getting out of bed in the morning lately cause I hear her voice in the kitchen and it's so piercing and I am so scared! Agh....

I really just needed to share that...anyone who can relate, please post it would be really appreciated right now

xx shosh

[let it all in]

Run a bath
Fill it with epsom salt, bubbles, your favorite smelling soap...etc
Close your eyes
*OR just lie down and relax in a comfy chair or bed
Put on a love song. (The Only Exception by Paramore is one that I like)

Instead of thinking about a time you were heartbroken, or even your current partner, think about yourself. Take all that love and passion that the singer is singing and let it all in. Hug yourself and sit in awe of the love you are showing yourself by attempting to recover from the trauma that occupies your mind day and night. Appreciate that unconditional love and forgiveness you are showing to yourself.

It is a tool that I have been using since I was a teen and it helps me fill that loss of love that my father failed to show me.

If you are hesitant to try something like this out of fear of being too vulnerable with yourself, refer to the quote below.

"If you are truly strong, there is little need to emphasize it to yourself and others. Best to take another track entirely and direct your attention where you fear most to look. You can do this by allowing yourself to feel, even to cry, to not have to have opinions about everything, to not appear invisible or unfeeling to others, but instead to be in touch with and appropriately open about your feelings. What looks like weakness is actually where your strength lies. And what looks like strength is often weakness, an attempt to cover up the fear; this is an act or facade, however convincing it might appear to others or even to yourself." -Jon Kabat-Zinn

xx

I am 21 yr old college student who was neglected by my father and my older sister has BPD. I am also still recovering from abusive relationships in my life.

When I have nothing going on, or have a night with no plans my mind will go straight to self harm...even though I have done so much self care and am in such a better place, my mind ruminates on self and harm and thinking "I'm nothing" or "no one likes me"

It's so rediculus! Especially because I know that I am a great person! And that it's not true! But that inner critic keeps coming up...

Just wanted to share because this is what I'm going through right now. Usually I just brush it off, but I want to know if anyone else can relate. This website it so encouraging and I am so happy I found all of you.

Thank you for reading. Spreading my love to all of you. We can do this.