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Messages - Jdog

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1
Recovery Journals / Re: Deep Blueís searching for balance journal
« on: March 22, 2019, 02:03:16 AM »
Your story brings up sadness and a huge desire to protect you.  I am so very, very sorry that you were made to endure so much abuse.  So much more than anyone should ever have to go through, at any age.  Yes, have many safe hugs and know that whatever responses you are having are ok and absolutely normal, considering what took place.  You are a survivor, a true inspiration! :hug: :hug: :hug:

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Iím sending you my best kind thoughts and warmth through the digital media waves.  We are here with you, helping you stand strong during this awful ordeal.   :grouphug:

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Recovery Journals / Re: BeHea1thy's Journal
« on: March 16, 2019, 02:27:44 PM »
Awesome Sauce!!

4
Recovery Journals / Re: BeHea1thy's Journal
« on: March 14, 2019, 02:39:12 AM »
Gotta love that studious, persistent part of you, BeHea1thy!  Thanks for being an inspiration to us! :cheer:

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Recovery Journals / Re: Deep Blueís searching for balance journal
« on: March 14, 2019, 01:07:51 AM »
Sending along  :hug: and the confidence that you will make your way through this hard time.

6
Recovery Journals / Re: JDog's Journal
« on: March 11, 2019, 12:59:37 PM »
I am dressed and ready to launch my day, watching the TV news to see about possible slow traffic areas along my route.  I always get to school very early to rethink my lesson and just be able to ease into my day, and today comes with an intensified need for advance preparation.  My committee for the accreditation process meets with the accreditation team first, and it will be a relief to be on the other side of that 90 minutes. 

I am thinking about the intellectual sluggishness exhibited by some of kids who are so much more connected to their smartphones than they are to my class.  I know that many teachers have class websites and post homework and such but as I look at student grades, the students who donít read my weekly printed calendar and donít make note of the homework reminder posted on my board are also not doing the homework posted online by some other teachers.   What to make of this......
It is not an excuse for me not to go digital, but believe it or not I am not a very tech savvy person.  I have a Twitter account that I never use, no Facebook or Instagram.  So itís a challenge for me to learn new ways of posting.  And, too, fewer than half of the parents of our students even bother to use our districtís online grade and attendance reporting system, which I utilize religiously.  I am proud of always being up to date on grades, unlike some of those who maintain their teacher websites.  Go figure.

I will close for now.  I appreciate this space to help me ferret out my thoughts.

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Recovery Journals / Re: JDog's Journal
« on: March 11, 2019, 01:21:03 AM »
Thank you all.  You are so very kind and your kindness makes a difference to me. 

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Recovery Journals / Re: Deep Blueís searching for balance journal
« on: March 10, 2019, 03:34:57 PM »
Blue-

Donít place shame and blame on yourself for your responses.  You deserve care just as your sweet son deserves care. 

Sending you kind thoughts at this difficult time.

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Recovery Journals / Re: JDog's Journal
« on: March 09, 2019, 04:17:56 PM »

***TW***

Whew- itís been quite a week.  I realized how much things are affecting me when my wife told me Imhad forgotten to run the dishwasher and we had company coming for dinner last night.  After feeling he shame of letting her down, I washed them all by hand before making the salad.  Any easy fix.

Lots of stress at work - everything from getting the entire school ready for a huge evaluation by an outside panel (they visit Mon-Weds. and their approval rating means kidsí diplomas are legitimate) to coping with the continuing budget crisis my district faces (the state will probably take us over in the next 6 months) to dealing with the sad news of a studentís demise by her own hand.....itís a lot. 

Adding to this, my city continues to roil with turmoil over the killing of an unarmed person by police last year.  Students walked out of many schools on Thursday and there was a community march last Monday.  I have my own feelings about all of this but the point is, itís a lot to manage.

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Recovery Journals / Re: Deep Blueís searching for balance journal
« on: March 07, 2019, 01:36:38 AM »
Love you, Blue.  You are definitely not alone.  Although we are all over the world in a physical sense, emotionally we are right here next to you.  Holding your hand, looking into your eyes.  Weíve got this.

 :grouphug:

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Recovery Journals / Re: Discovery Journal
« on: March 06, 2019, 03:58:44 PM »
Sending you caring and friendship during this difficult time, 3Roses.  Shame is a sticky substance that holds on even when we have no further use for it.  Be as compassionate with yourself as you would be with another whom you dearly love.  You deserve a break! :hug:

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Recovery Journals / Re: JDog's Journal
« on: March 06, 2019, 01:35:21 AM »
 :hug:

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Beneficial use of resources also means finding those little nuggets of gold inside of the smelly and unappealing aspects of our lives, right?  Resources are limited but creativity doesnít have to be, I think.  Thatís what I want to keep in mind today, anyhow....

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Recovery Journals / Re: JDog's Journal
« on: March 05, 2019, 12:43:18 PM »
 :hug:

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Recovery Journals / Re: JDog's Journal
« on: March 05, 2019, 10:43:20 AM »
Itís a little after 2 a.m. and I couldnít sleep so got up and made my morning cuppa joe.  Or pot of it, more accurately.  I realized I had ordered something from Amazon and forgot to check the front stoop since I came in through the entry from our garage last night.  Thankfully, my little package was waiting for me just now, an amazing thing considering the prevalence of porch pirates.  My little combination metronome/instrument tuner is all in one piece, from the looks of it.

I am aware that I must be stricter with my last class of the day.  Yesterday was not easy, partly because I didnít properly enforce the seating chart and a cluster of low level,kids was sitting together.  I must type the chart into my computer (it has been just in pencil form for the past couple of weeks) and that will also remind me to be stricter with the students about their seating.  Honestly, years ago when I moved from teaching middle school to high school I thought that some of the immature behaviors would fade away.  Some do, but many linger.  This is especially the case with kids who have not had great parenting.  The ones who are causing me grief are either being raised by grandparents or are in foster care.  They, in turn, get others in the class stirred up and there goes my lesson plan.  And yes, being a person with cptsd means I get triggered as well.  Sigh.

Maybe I will try to close my eyes a bit or read now.  I am reading Barbara Tuchmanís book about the 14th Century, ďA Distant Mirror.Ē  It is both wonderful history, escapism, and a chance to consider the present era and be somewhat grateful that at least some of the practices from the past have changed.....

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