Messages

Thank you very much for your responses Saylor and Phoebes!  In reply to you Phoebes, my wife actually attended most of my therapy sessions (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy).  It was very important for me for her to be a part of my healing process, and she was able to help the therapists know things from her perspective that helped them help me.  I feel that the healthiest and safest relationships are those that we don't need to hide ourselves from them, and they are willing to accept our imperfections.  Only those who think they are perfect are those who won't accept the truth of who we are, and they might have N.P.D. anyway...

Would it be helpful or harmful to communicate to acquaintances and family members that I have Complex PTSD, and to let them know what it is?  Should I keep it a secret and work hard to pretend to be "normal"?

This is great information!  I also highly recommend "Healing from Hidden Abuse" by Shannon Thomas:  https://healingfromhiddenabuse.com/

I can almost totally relate!  Our experiences are very similar and I too am in the process of healing.

Thank you very much for all the encouragement and welcoming!  Validation, respect, and understanding are key to my ability to establish healthy relationships, and this is a great start for me!

I have "graduated" from therapy and have tried a local trauma recovery group.  I have read "Healing from Hidden Abuse", "Complex PTSD From Thriving to Surviving", and "Safe People" by Cloud and Townsend.  I am continuing to learn how to identify who my abusers were, and who potential abusers are.  I am also learning how to stop making excuses for, and excusing abusive behavior of my abusers.  And I'm learning how to create and maintain healthy boundaries.  It's good for me to acknowledge which people are unhealthy for me to be in relationship with.  Now, I am ready to develop healthy relationships.  I have very few healthy relationships.  I have a very loving and supportive wife, I have family members that understand and support me to varying degrees, and a friend that can relate and understand, but has his own issues to work out.  I do not have any friends that would be willing to understand, accept, and validate my condition that I can have healthy relationships with.  I do not want to waste my time, or have negative / unhealthy outcomes in developing relationships with people who have little or no interest in being authentic, genuine, and sincere.  It would be good for me to relate to people who know that it would be good for each other to have a healthy accountability within the relationship.  Has anyone had successful relationships along these lines?