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Thank you Saylor. I have had the same type of issues at jobs as well. Some worse than others. Years back when I first returned to work after a sort of  "breakdown" I was definitely in a fragile state. I accepted a job that was out of my normal field at a restaurant. Right away every person there was extremely rude. They would out right ignore me when I said hello, started gossiping about me, started blaming me for everything that went wrong and so on. I felt as if I was purposely pushed out. Then I went back to my normal field where the people are a bit more rough around the edges. I still encounter some of the same issues with some of the people but no where near as bad as it was at the restaurant. But I have always had these types of issues with people in just about every situation throughout my entire life.

I understand I am a bit different from the average person and I assume that I may be seeing things not so clearly at times. However I am honest, hardworking and genuinely kind so I kind of dont understand what the deal is I guess. I'm not good at small talk, I'm not good at putting on fake anythings, I watch how alot of people interact and I really do not understand much of it so I know I'm socially awkward or socially different I guess. I absolutely am always scanning for threats. To tell you the truth, after reading your reply and the other kind persons reply as well as a few other posts in the forum I think I may need a little more help than I thought. I mean I think I may have overestimated my own progress quite a bit. I say this because you all seem way more insightful and knowledgeable than myself. I really appreciate it though seriously.

Also before I go, as far as being unattractive there are days I look in the mirror and percieve myself as extremely ugly and other days not ugly at all. These are not minor perception shifts...I mean I really look like a very different person to myself wich I have yet to understand as well. It's all so confusing. I guess that's all I got right now.Thanks so much again!

Wow that was actually super helpful Three Rose's. I really appreciate you taking the time to write that reply. I thought it was possibly due to flattened affect or some kind of disruption in my body language but I mean it has happened so often I was starting to think I look like a criminal or something that frightens people.i am definitely going to check out the link you posted. Thanks again!have a great day

Hello, I am new to the forum. I am not sure where to appropriately place my post so I hope this is ok. I have not been able to find an answer to this question anywhere else and it's very frustrating. I have cptsd, I am generally doing much better than I was for the majority of my life...I was a complete mess for a long time. So I'm not sure if this has anything to do with cptsd but it seems like everywhere I go people are very rude to me or completely put off by my presence. This happens all the time. People have suggested it's in my head so I've made it a point to pay very close attention and still it happens. For instance I will stand in a line at a store and watch the cashier smile and laugh and be very positive with the 5 people in front of me...then I walk up and I say "hi how are you"and I watch the smile disappear and the positive attitude go flat and the cashier goes from friendly to short and rude.it may sound crazy but this happens to me every day in all sorts of situations. Dirty looks, unfriendly behavior, people acting like I've wronged them somehow. This even happens at my jobs. I honestly have only 1 friend who also has cptsd.its not from a lack of trying either.I suppose I would just like to know if this is something that anyone else deals with?Why does this happen?is this connected to cptsd? I have to assume at this point that I must put off a vibe of some sort that makes people feel weird or something..I don't know.I appreciate any help, thank you.