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Wow, don't you feel better now?! Isn't that great news! yay!!!

Here you go!

https://www.youtube.com/user/BuddhistSocietyWA

http://dharmapunxnyc.podbean.com/

There are some really good titles here...enjoy!

From my viewpoint, I can't say I am lonely, even with all of the relationships I had ending. I have a good number of friends who are great and have a lot of class. Even then, I really enjoy my alone time. I would rather have alone time than spend it wastefully on bad relationships.

Ultimately for me, I just can't take the stress of dealing with screwed up relationships any more. 

I had a very good friend who got me to south america--she is 68. She started having  all these preventable health issues that she started calling me in desperate need over. She had 4 major medical emergencies in 4 months. I told her a number time that I have PTSD, and cannot be around high stress situations. Yet, she put in a some really bad situations by not taking care of herself (she is a nurse) and escalating situations so that she can get attention from everybody around her. it is really sick and disturbing.

So I has to move quickly, as I lived right next to her and bore the full brunt. I moved and got a new place. When she started threatening cut off of the internet service (knowing my business is internet based) after I saved her life, I got the * away from her as fast as I could. This is sick *. She was deliberately trying to hurt me and my business operations. This was a LONG term friend. This is a real recent one.

My boyfriend kept yelling and griping literally every day. Multiple times in a day. I have told him that I have PTSD and cant take the stress of having blowups from him every couple of days. I told him this repeatedly, and offered to go to counselling. He ruined a trip to Peru, cause us to come back a week early from his malcontent complaining. I just could not take any more crap. I told him if he wanted to get help for his temper, I would support him, but this was his choice.  I was done. This was finalized last week as a break up.

Honestly, I do not understand how these people can think they are entitled to my pound of flesh. Both of them I did many things for and made lives a lot better, but both were so broken, they just could not reciprocate. I  spoiled them, and they become entitled.

Very similar story here as well.....BIG HUGS HONEY.....

FINE, fine list there....the first three of these have in common the "lack of empathy" element. Distancing from folks who have blatant "lack of empathy" is absolutely crucial for recovery. I just had to break up with a fairly decent boyfriend in many respects because of his "anger issues", which really culminated into a lack of empathy, cause I told him it triggered me and unsuccessfully offered to do counselling with him. So...BYE BYE. 

And your 4th is similar to my 4th. Ultimately, people with boor boundaries are reckless, including some elderly (not just codependents and * raisers), and will only drag you down in a BAD, BAD way. 

KEEP IT UP!!!

FS, I think this is a very hurtful thing that needs a boundary. I have been through these things myself many times. 

Over time, friends like this have disappeared, as I have a boundary to create distance from people who do not make an effort to "get me".  This is actually a problem with processing empathy, and in my case, it always leads to * being around people like this. maybe in my recovery I have become more Judge Judy like, and less patient, but constantly getting my feeling hurt because I was not being "heard" really did it in for me. I only interact with people who try to "hear" me.

You notice how the great folks on the board try to understand you? Validate you (and everybody else)? Well, I see communities like this as a template of what people I need to cultivate friendships with in the regular world. When you start setting humane boundaries, you will lose the shallow friendships right quick, and then you will see the folks who really respect you revealed.

Please don't let the insensitive, crappy people get you down. 

Flook, you are one awesome person....thanks for being here.

Thank you SC, you are a doll!

Oh, RTFM, I so relate. SOOOOOO much. It takes a long time, but I have managed to make my finally go away.

I would get exhausted too. I often wondered if this was seizure activity in my limbic system, as I was messed up for days afterward.

This is how I stopped this anger and anxiety attack. I listened to Dharma talks. (I am not religious). I would listed to one right after the other until the emotion dissipated and I feel asleep. It works and its FREE. For me, these attacks I believe damaged my memory centers and would trigger psychosis, so it was very important to stop these before permanent biological damage was done.

Let me know if you would like some  links...

R, isn't this phenomenon bizarre? Simply requesting humane courtesies unleashes wrath that would make Jesus cringe.

I still don't get it, but it is a pattern that happen when your wrapped up with selfish, no damned good people. Keep up the good work!

Oh C., thanks so much! You see how so important it is to protect our memory and frontal lobe centers. When strokes or head injuries happen in these areas, it is catastrophic and renders the person disabled most of the time.

I will say this. As we SLLLLoOOOwly recover our brain function, this is a good excuse to never allow ourselves to undergo this trauma ever again. There is nothing, or nobody, who is worth undergoing brain damage and the dicey, hugely expensive (all forms of emotional and financial cost) recovery experience. Personally, I think I have spent my 8th cat life getting to this point, and I don't have it in me to do this all over again. I don't think a lot of us here can.

Remember, people like us like statistically 20 years less than non CPTSD people. And recovery is such a bear. Again, thanks so much and keep at it.

good one Kizzie!

I immediately enforce boundaries. Here are my 4 boundaries

Distance my self from:
1. People who have issues with lying
2. People who have issues with addiction
3. People who have issues processing empathy (BIGGG ONE)
4. People who are reckless (including the elderly)

when stressed, like this week, I do self love, self spoiling stuff. I go on a walk, visit friends, have some tea, listen to music, get small sweet treats. Also, massage, getting nails done and acupuncture  are really cheap here where I live, so I might do those. Also, there are some really good folks here on this forum.

Very important to self soothe in a healthy fashion. 

I hope this helps.

I second this...being around this type of stress will inhibit healing...

Big hugs...

IMHO, a scapegoat is a scapegoat.  This is a terrible role to be cast into.  One of my biggest boundaries is to severely curtail associations with empathy impaired people, period. You notice how the folks on the board tend to "get" you? You notice this person does NOT get you?

Dealing with empathy impaired people always lead to *.

Godspeed, I send good JuJu your way....

GOOD GIRL!!!!!!! Yay!!!!!