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Topics - Contessa

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General Discussion / Swearing too much
« on: August 14, 2016, 12:53:21 AM »
Does anybody else swear/cuss too much? I'm struggling with it big time. Have been able to catch myself recently while generally settling, or apologise for any slips immediately. But was triggered the other day and now f-bombs are coming out left right and centre. Not liking this but I do not know if I am losing control, or at this stage voluntarily relinquishing it to just aid the release of frustration. Almost certain its the latter. Either way, I don't like it.

Thinking of starting a swear jar to donate to a charitable organisation, or even just starting a art project - have a sketch book full of artistic swear words. You know those signs people sometimes decorate their places with (love... family... joy... etc). Any other ideas that help?

General Discussion / Trusting people
« on: August 13, 2016, 11:51:21 PM »
Hello all. For me, and I assume many us here, the ability to trust people is strained. Sometimes it is warranted but times we need to work on our selves to let it happen. This is something I need to work on, and really want to. Has anybody else been able to work on this aspect of their relationships to work toward healthier relationships with others?

Frustrated? Set Backs? / Triggered
« on: August 12, 2016, 09:11:46 AM »
Hey all, had a setback today and not feeling too good. Any suggestions for short term coping strategies that don't involve a hot bath? Thank you

General Discussion / untriggered
« on: July 23, 2016, 11:12:50 AM »
This may seem like a strange question, but one of my biggest triggers over the last few years... now does nothing.

Music was a massive trigger for me, but for the last couple of weeks i've not only started playing music willingly and incessantly, but have started singing and dancing to it again. So in actual fact, its not doing nothing, its bringing me joy again.

Not that i'm complaining, its a huge leap forward. But I don't understand this. Can anyone shed light on this strange occurance?

General Discussion / How are you all going?
« on: July 20, 2016, 02:13:24 AM »
Hi Everyone.

Been checking in but overall commenting less as more and more focus is shifting toward work/social interactions as part of recovery.

This may seem like a redundant question given the variety of posts, but wanted to see how others are going as they progress through the different stages of recovery.

I've noticed a general progression toward greater calm and focus toward tasks of academic research, relaxation and creative pursuits which is utterly strange considering the norm has not been that for six years. This is accomanied by music no longer being a trigger - over the past week i've been listening to several albums a day while I potter about at home, and loving it with abandon. Never thought that would ever be again.

So how are you all going overall?

Successes, Progress? / Anger receding...
« on: July 07, 2016, 02:40:35 AM »
Hey all,

Thank you for your interaction with me over the past several weeks. I've noticed that my anger has reduced quite significantly of late, and it feels so good to have that weight reduced. Its been that devil on my shoulder for a few years now. My mind is clearer, and i'm starting to handle life just that bit better. The most positive thing is that I am now better able to evaluate outward expression of that anger, and identify how justified it is in particular situations. Hopefully I can keep this up!

Discussions with you have helped immensely. Very grateful to have found this forum.

General Discussion / CPTSD and Surgery
« on: July 05, 2016, 03:52:39 AM »
Hi All,

I have just read a post by Kizzie (under Prevention, Advocacy and Awareness) regarding the need for medical professionals to be aware of the difference between PTSD and CPTSD when we are admitted to surgery.

It got me thinking of the last time I was in hospital for a day procedure, I did not come out of the unaesthetic well at all, and believe that I had an emotional flashback of sorts (still not sure what it was). That said, I had had a stressful couple of days beforehand, because this had never happened before, and I have not had any procedures since.

Just curious, has anybody else experienced any unpleasantness after or during surgery?

Hi all.

It seems to be the place for venting here so I think I might too. Just a bit worked up right now, and I know what I am going to say is entirely irrational. I'm not upset with myself, but upset that i'm torturing myself.

Went out with some mates last night and had a fantastic time. In the course of the evening, I found out that the absolute douche (I hope this isn't considered swearing... I'm Australian so its almost a term of endearment here), that I was seeing a couple of months ago has broken it off with the girl he started to see essentially while were... well you know... hallmark narcy stuff.

Now I am very conscious about not putting myself down or blaming myself, but why can I not stop thinking about him? Why?? He was an absolute *many, many expletives deleted*. So why am I thinking about him? Why am I even entertaining the idea of contacting him?? Nothing good will come out of anything to do with him, so why am I doing this to myself?

Any thoughts/pearls of wisdom welcome  :'(

General Discussion / Personality Change
« on: June 10, 2016, 03:32:54 AM »
Just want to put a question out there and see what others might have experienced.

Over a period of four years in my adult life, I unfortunately suffered through not one but several traumatic experiences which overlapped. Support from friends and family at this time was on the whole non existent. I would not go so far as to say that I had suffered trauma during childhood, though there was plenty of room for a more positive upbringing.

I feel like my entire personality has completely changed from before the events to after. Its like an actor performing a different character from one movie to the next. Does anybody else feel the same?

This article discusses the importance of Complex PTSD as a singular diagnosis. It argues that misdiagnoses and treatment of patients with several different disorders (BPD, DID, etc) that address their individual symptoms can be alleviated with therapy targeted toward just one, being Complex PTSD. A short read.

Taycan, O. and Yildirim, A., 2015. An alternative approach to the effects of multiple traumas: complex post-traumatic stress disorder. NOROPSIKIYATRI ARSIVI-ARCHIVES OF NEUROPSYCHIATRY, 52(3), pp.312-314.

Introductory Post / Newbie
« on: June 09, 2016, 05:49:08 AM »
Hello all,

I am a new member to OOTS and new to forum contribution in general. I have just been diagnosed with cPTSD by my psychologist and am at the beginning of my recovery. I have been researching and reading up on cPTSD and related mental health conditions in an attempt to finally understand what has been happening to me over the last several years.

It has been very helpful and inspirational to read the personal stories of others, and see the support that each person gives one another. Life at the moment feels like it is on hold, so it I look forward to restarting it again with you.

Thank you for having me here  :)

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