Messages

Welcome, Anamiame.

I hear you, and I am sending a 

You know you should have never, ever gone through your mother's unspeakable abuse.

To the frightened, little girl inside you ...I am glad you are here.

To the adult you, I admire your Journey.

You know these words, but take them in even deeper ...you had a normal reaction to a highly abnormal childhood.

Last night, I was reading about PTSD delayed expression where our symptoms to the original abuse come into full expression even years later.    Your mother's passing seems to have ushered that in for you.   But, it can be a gift in healing.    I hope you stay here, and share your Journey, your healing.   Labels help guide on what to read, but they do NOT define who you are.

Fragments come together, they integrate, and I look forward to seeing the wounds heal in you.    You can be free now, happy now.   Positive.    Have hope.

Grace and healing in your Journey.

Rain

Take care, and I hope the sleep specialist helps.   A counselor to go over what you wrote about could also really help you sort it out.   We all have benefitted from a knowledgeable expert with an outside view.

Grace and Healing in Your Journey.

Rain

Hi Mickey776,

I am sending you a safe  and I am so sorry you are in this situation.

Hopefully you are near a large enough city which would have a sleep specialist.   I realize your issues are larger than sleep, but that seems the place to start.

Contact the sleep specialist office and ask for their advice on a safe place / shelter you can stay while in that city receiving their medical help.   They should be able to advice you on next steps, or at least, you will be able to think clearer.   

You also will be away from the abusers.    Keep in touch with us here, so you will not be so isolated.   Okay?

"Sprinkler acid" all the time.   Tiny drops of constant toxic verbal and emotional abuse.   Gather all the tiny drops together, and it is buckets of acid over the years.   If abuse is small enough per incident, it can be denied.   It is still abuse, quite an ugly form of it.

  to you, keepfighting!

Please read this web site, and Dr. Evans books on Verbal Abuse are ones I recommend.   It has been eye-opening what we get used to.

http://www.verbalabuse.com/

I hope your you and your husband can protect yourself from her.   And, of course, I am concerned about your husband's friend and the children.   No one should be exposed to this.

And yes, keep the analogy of "slaps to the face" in mind ...leave.   Physical and emotional strikes are the same, and emotional are indeed even worse.

I'm glad you are choosing safety and the well being of all.   

I am loving this thread.   Love.   Being.

Wonderful words, Trees ...you've integrated it all.   Gathered it to yourself, and felt the "hug" of it.   I feel joy with that.

Flook, the woods analogy is now officially added to my "healing toolbox."   Thank you, friend.

There is every reason to have hope.   To know we can do this.    That what we are experiencing is to be treasured as it simply is ...because it is our Journey.

Along the way, we find Ourselves.

The true path is Love.

Yeah, flook's got it!   Walk away from that burning bridge.

Glad to hear your support family here at OOTS has your back, keepfighting, as you do ours.   

"Dance, when you're broken open. Dance, if you've torn the bandage off. Dance in the middle of the fighting. Dance in your blood. Dance when you're perfectly free."

I love the Rumi quote, Trees.  Thank you!  I would add we can "dance in our silence and in perfect stillness of movement" as well.   To be, and to celebrate it, is the Dance.

Even if you are feeling the need to to be tucked away, do that as your own dance.   Being seen, being heard can be a risk.   It is safe here; your words are welcomed, Trees.

And for me, nothing is more precious than hearing and seeing one that has opened, and taken that risk.   I know the courage in it.    Also, there are gifts that come out of stillness, and silence.

Feel the Joy, Feel the Sorrow.   Heart songs birth from these.

I learn a lot from you, marycontrary.   Thank you!!

Hugs back to you, Cat.   

Cat, this is an amazing post, as was the "you matter" one you also brilliantly wrote.   Thank you, as ever.

It seems to me that when doing healing work, to slow the responsibilities in life down.   It is like doing engine work on a car.  The engine gets pulled, parts get replaced, and the car does not go anywhere during this time ..but once put back together, the car really, really performs soooo much better.

Your past and your husband's past are your present day crisis.

If that reality can be seen by both of you, and with the help of the therapist, the emotional healing can happen.

Healing from PTSD can be dangerous whether alone or as a couple.    Love, understanding, slowing things down to allow for the safe release of the past traumas is critical.

There are gifts in this.    All of you can recover, and your children can learn lessons from seeing this healing.

It is a group effort.   A family effort, and protecting the children most of all.

Protect, patience and love.

Wonderful post, Cat!      Thank you.     

Welcome, Nibbe.   

Nice to meet you.     

You got it, Kizzie!!  I imagine the same for you as you finished your class.