Recent posts
#1
Friends / Re: I can make friends but I c...
Last post by Blueberry - October 13, 2025, 11:50:45 PMWelcome to the forum Blaithe 
I'm discovering more and more how difficult it is for me to maintain friendships, although there was a good few years in my healing journey when I seemed to be doing quite well. I thought I had lots of good friends. But I'm really pulling back atm and I'm not phoning my friends, I'm not even leaving the house.
I have a history of NO romantic relationships because I dissociate and/or my body goes numb at the thought. I'm in my 50's. In comparison, 3 months is long and I think it gives you some experience, which is generally helpful in some way.
Wanting to heal is a good start. I wish you healing step by step and hope you find this forum as supportive as I have over the years.
I'm discovering more and more how difficult it is for me to maintain friendships, although there was a good few years in my healing journey when I seemed to be doing quite well. I thought I had lots of good friends. But I'm really pulling back atm and I'm not phoning my friends, I'm not even leaving the house.
Quote from: Blaithe on October 13, 2025, 07:14:04 AMI get dissociated especially when they delay a reply.I'm sorry. I dissociate for lots of reasons and know how sudden and debilitating it can be. I very often delay with replies - months sometimes, or even years. It may of course look like rejection and abandonment, but actually the reasons are different e.g. it often takes me a long time to figure out what I really feel. So this could be the case with other people who don't reply to you. It may not have so much to do with you personally as you believe. I don't mean to minimise what you're experiencing - please tell me if it comes across that way.
I have a history of NO romantic relationships because I dissociate and/or my body goes numb at the thought. I'm in my 50's. In comparison, 3 months is long and I think it gives you some experience, which is generally helpful in some way.
Wanting to heal is a good start. I wish you healing step by step and hope you find this forum as supportive as I have over the years.
#2
Please Introduce Yourself Here / Re: Hello
Last post by Kizzie - October 13, 2025, 11:38:48 PMHi Sapphire and a warm welcome to Out of the Storm! I hope you'll find information and support here that helps you get unstuck.
Do you see a therapist at all? That, in conjunction with coming here, may just do the trick and start things moving in a recovery direction.
Kizzie
I hope you'll find information and support here that helps you get unstuck. Do you see a therapist at all? That, in conjunction with coming here, may just do the trick and start things moving in a recovery direction.
Kizzie
#3
Letters of Recovery / Re: Hi Love Bug, (A Letter for...
Last post by GettingThere - October 13, 2025, 10:27:59 PM
#4
Recovery Journals / Re: Healing journal (tw) Anger...
Last post by StartingHealing - October 13, 2025, 10:26:48 PM10/13/25
What is F-ing wrong with people?!?!? One of my sisters created a group chat of folks to keep everyone informed of what was going on with the middle sister. The new gen texting apps have this thing where you can react to a text that was received. OK cool. IMO someone fat fingered the reaction and the fecal matter ... hit the fan. what the F?!?! Every one in that group is grieving over what happened and the instigators of the sh_- storm, like really?
( insert long, loud, and creative cuss phrases here for about 5 minutes )
You know, I'm changing up a phrase a little bit. Toxic people are gonna toxic, doesn't matter if your family or not.
the text was asking folks to not post anything on social media until certain things got settled. That was the entire thing. Just don't post on social media for a period of time. Then with the reaction to the fat fingered reaction ..
I'm not, I refuse, I will not be engaging with those people, those toxic a-holes, going forward. It's saddening, but by all that is holy, to act that way? At this time? At least I have the comfort of knowing that I'm NOT genetically related to them. I've already started to quietly and slowly withdraw and then when the opportunity is right, poof. I'll disappear from them. I'm planning on moving which means a different address, ( I use a PO box anyway ) change my #, different drivers license, change email, and 0 mail forwarding. Only very select few will know any contact info for me.
Wishing all here all the best.
What is F-ing wrong with people?!?!? One of my sisters created a group chat of folks to keep everyone informed of what was going on with the middle sister. The new gen texting apps have this thing where you can react to a text that was received. OK cool. IMO someone fat fingered the reaction and the fecal matter ... hit the fan. what the F?!?! Every one in that group is grieving over what happened and the instigators of the sh_- storm, like really?
( insert long, loud, and creative cuss phrases here for about 5 minutes ) You know, I'm changing up a phrase a little bit. Toxic people are gonna toxic, doesn't matter if your family or not.
the text was asking folks to not post anything on social media until certain things got settled. That was the entire thing. Just don't post on social media for a period of time. Then with the reaction to the fat fingered reaction ..
I'm not, I refuse, I will not be engaging with those people, those toxic a-holes, going forward. It's saddening, but by all that is holy, to act that way? At this time? At least I have the comfort of knowing that I'm NOT genetically related to them. I've already started to quietly and slowly withdraw and then when the opportunity is right, poof. I'll disappear from them. I'm planning on moving which means a different address, ( I use a PO box anyway ) change my #, different drivers license, change email, and 0 mail forwarding. Only very select few will know any contact info for me.
Wishing all here all the best.
#5
Recovery Journals / Re: Desert Flower's Recovery J...
Last post by Blueberry - October 13, 2025, 10:24:41 PMDF, I read too. I second NK but I can't write it all out, I'm sorry. 
I'm so with you on the over-use of "trauma" and "trigger" by those without ptsd or cptsd.
I'm so with you on the over-use of "trauma" and "trigger" by those without ptsd or cptsd.
#6
Recovery Journals / Re: TV's Repair Journal
Last post by StartingHealing - October 13, 2025, 09:57:27 PMlowbudgetTV, personally I think that is one killer superpower! Perhaps has nothing to do with any type of damage at all. I agree that most of the 'net is corpo crap. For a hot take on the current state of the net, look into the dead internet theory. I don't remember exactly where I read it, however the claim is that a traffic analysis of all internet traffic, 51% is bot activity with the % predicted to hit something like 90% within a few years.
Going on an adventure to find good art is a worthwhile thing. I appreciate the makers, those that roll their own site, or paint, dance, sculpt or whatever. Art, true art, crafted by humans feeds other humans souls. The slew of AI generated pap don't, and the corpo crapola don't either.
For a old school type of site, what about craigslist for buying / selling ? No need for FB marketplace which is mainly bots anyway. The local craigslist is where I got a lead on a really good used car for really decent $$ that I ended up getting. I tried FB marketplace and .. the results were not good. Even on simple stuff. I was trying to find like a back of the couch table and .. I finally gave up, went to craigslist, and boom, done deal that day, where I had spent like 5 days on FB marketplace.
I know a little bit about cyber security and having a "avatar" with a made up name is actually good security policy out on the web. Just like having an alias email, or a alias CC# or even a web based # that forwards to your real #, or using a VPN as standard practice. Unfortunately it has gotten to the point that we do need to be aware of the digital footprint that is created by us. Well, the data that is collected is then fed into a model and then that is used to deliver targeted ads to us. I'm right there with you. I haven't gotten a check from ___________________ yet for the revenues they got from my data. As such, F them. Go Galt. That's what I'm doing.
Going on an adventure to find good art is a worthwhile thing. I appreciate the makers, those that roll their own site, or paint, dance, sculpt or whatever. Art, true art, crafted by humans feeds other humans souls. The slew of AI generated pap don't, and the corpo crapola don't either.
For a old school type of site, what about craigslist for buying / selling ? No need for FB marketplace which is mainly bots anyway. The local craigslist is where I got a lead on a really good used car for really decent $$ that I ended up getting. I tried FB marketplace and .. the results were not good. Even on simple stuff. I was trying to find like a back of the couch table and .. I finally gave up, went to craigslist, and boom, done deal that day, where I had spent like 5 days on FB marketplace.
I know a little bit about cyber security and having a "avatar" with a made up name is actually good security policy out on the web. Just like having an alias email, or a alias CC# or even a web based # that forwards to your real #, or using a VPN as standard practice. Unfortunately it has gotten to the point that we do need to be aware of the digital footprint that is created by us. Well, the data that is collected is then fed into a model and then that is used to deliver targeted ads to us. I'm right there with you. I haven't gotten a check from ___________________ yet for the revenues they got from my data. As such, F them. Go Galt. That's what I'm doing.
#7
Recovery Journals / Re: Healing journal (tw) Anger...
Last post by StartingHealing - October 13, 2025, 09:18:00 PMQuote from: lowbudgetTV on October 13, 2025, 09:12:15 PMThank you lowbudgetTV. Appreciate it.
#8
Recovery Journals / Re: Healing journal (tw) Anger...
Last post by StartingHealing - October 13, 2025, 09:17:17 PMQuote from: Hope67 on October 13, 2025, 02:18:25 PMI resonate with what you said about things getting wrapped up into a big old mess. It's tough to negotiate the way through - especially with pressures and obligations. Sounds like you're tackling it though, as you mentioned thigns 'going on apiece' - hope it gets easier in moments of the day and week.Hi Hope. Thank you for the hug. Appreciated it.
Things are going forward. It's better at times and then at others not so much. Waves I guess you would call it. The thing is, I'm really good at keeping the boat floating. Not so good at tending to myself which I'm starting to learn though. The stuffing of the emotional turmoil.. especially in the last years with the former spouse is what I personally think pushed the BP to a point of needing medical attention.
#9
Recovery Journals / Re: Healing journal (tw) Anger...
Last post by lowbudgetTV - October 13, 2025, 09:12:15 PM sending support as you go through all this #10
Letters of Recovery / Re: Hi Love Bug, (A Letter for...
Last post by lowbudgetTV - October 13, 2025, 09:06:14 PM