Recent posts

#91

Recovery Journals / Re: the next step

Last post by TheBigBlue - February 12, 2026, 06:10:47 PM

 

#92

Frustrated? Set Backs? / Re: trying to make sense of th...

Last post by Dalloway - February 12, 2026, 05:17:29 PM

Thanks a lot to you too 

I can understand you perfectly, Dalloway, as I am also trying to do something with my life, searching for purposeful and fulfilling activities and something exciting, engaging and meaningful. And I am rarely satisfied with my results honestly.

Wishing you all the very best! 

 

#93

Frustrated? Set Backs? / Re: trying to make sense of th...

Last post by Dalloway - February 12, 2026, 05:16:41 PM

I'm realizing that I didn't complete my post and the book is Freedom From Your Inner Critic: A Self Therapy Approach by Jay Earley. It's a good place to start as he maps out how to work with parts like the inner critic if you're interested.

I checked out the book and it looks very interesting, thank you for the recommendation. 

#94

Recovery Journals / Re: Starting my journal

Last post by HannahOne - February 12, 2026, 04:28:07 PM

Holidayay, I'm new to the forum and just read your last two posts. Thank you for coming back and sharing your experience. So heartening to hear that so many things that once bothered you no longer do. And sobering to read that the grief continues. That makes so much sense. The grief is a part of me, I know. I can't wish it away without wishing myself away.

Having to show up in a social situation is still a trigger and that makes sense too, when part of what we are showing up with is complex grief, ambiguous loss.

Thank you again for sharing your experience. I don't know any better way to learn about CPTSD than from other survivors and I'm so grateful to have found this place and come to understand myself better---and meet so many amazing people who have persevered, sought healing, and found life to be worth living in the midst of that "gift that keeps on giving."

#95

Recovery Journals / Re: the next step

Last post by sanmagic7 - February 12, 2026, 03:46:05 PM

thanks, NK.  she's getting better but i'm taking her to urgent care today, just to make sure we're not missing anything.

so, i'm really run down today, it's finally caught up w/ me.  ugh.

#96

Recovery Journals / Re: Living As All of Me

Last post by NarcKiddo - February 12, 2026, 12:52:23 PM

This is not fair. You are entitled to have a bit of a foot-stamping tantrum in among all of this, if will help you let off some steam. Maybe that's what Frank is suggesting. We know, and your parts know, that you will decide on the best way forward out of care and love. For you, for them, for your kids, for Frank. It's a hard and scary time. Thank you for being so honest as you process this. Many of us may face similar issues at some stage. You sharing your experience is helpful for us, too.

 

#97

Recovery Journals / Re: Post-Traumatic Growth Jour...

Last post by dollyvee - February 12, 2026, 12:24:49 PM

Wow...all great news SO. Asking for what you need is a way to be seen and, the difficult part for me, is to not take it back for fear of repercussion. It sounds like you arenot self abandoning, but self affirming in uncomfortable situations and seeing who shows up for you and supports you when you do that 

[trauma adaptation]

#98

Recovery Journals / Re: Miscellaneous ramblings of...

Last post by dollyvee - February 12, 2026, 09:12:47 AM

What that looks like in real life:
- you don't just observe another's pain, but you become flooded by it
- you lose track of your own needs
- your nervous system reacts as if the pain were your own
=> This isn't kindness gone wrong.
It's a trauma adaptation.

TBB, to me this is fawning, a trauma adaptation.

Ingrid Clayton just wrote a very good book regarding fawning that I think touches on a lot of the things you're saying here.

NK, I wonder if you are pulled into the dysfunctional relational dynamics between your f and m and are perhaps their scapegoat in a way for the problems?
 

#99

Frustrated? Set Backs? / Re: trying to make sense of th...

Last post by dollyvee - February 12, 2026, 08:49:04 AM

I very much like the idea of facing the inner voice and being curious about it´s purposes and also asking where it thinks I should be and what I should do.

Hey Dalloway,

I just want to clarify my statement about connecting to the inner voice and dialoging with it. As you mentioned above, the Inner Critic will probably drive you to do things that make it feel better, which is what helped keep you safe as a child, but it's more of child consciousness rather than adult consciousness. It might be good to ask it rather why it wants you to do those things and what it's hoping to achieve by doing that.

I'm realizing that I didn't complete my post and the book is Freedom From Your Inner Critic: A Self Therapy Approach by Jay Earley. It's a good place to start as he maps out how to work with parts like the inner critic if you're interested.

Sending you support,
dolly

#100

Recovery Journals / Re: Living As All of Me

Last post by TheBigBlue - February 12, 2026, 04:30:49 AM

I'm so, so sorry you're facing this. I had endometrial cancer and a total hysterectomy seven years ago. Especially the months leading up to surgery were brutal, and at the time I didn't have words for it. Looking back, I know CPTSD did not make any of it easier.

I'm sharing this only to say that what you're describing makes so much sense to me - this is an enormous load, and the reactions of your parts are deeply understandable. It's a human nervous system responding to something overwhelming and unjust. You don't have to frame this as strength or fighting. You're allowed to take this one breath, one decision, one moment at a time.

I'm really glad you're letting us be here with you in this. And I want to say this simply: the world is genuinely better with you in it - exactly as you are, even in this fear, even in this uncertainty. You matter, and your presence matters. 💛