"Picking" a career

[LadybugBee]

Hi folks,

After being diagnosed and learning about c-ptsd over the last year, I've been re-evaluating my life. I had a great job at a huge tech company, and I reasonably liked the job. However, I had a terrible time working with my boss. I found her to be unreasonable and mean. She would tell me I was frustrating her and that she was unhappy with my work constantly. This triggered memories of my mother. I had to take a medical leave to try and cope with the flashbacks and triggers.

I decided the environment was no longer healthy for me, and I quit. I planned out my finances for the next few months and put in my two weeks notice.

Now I'm on the job hunt. My background is in dance-- I was a very gifted dancer and worked steadily in NYC for 8 years. I now live in Silicon Valley, which is fine but not my forever place. I don't fit in here-- I'm not a "rise and grind" kind of person. I don't really care about consumer electronics.

I'm "supposed" to be following my heart and listening to my intuition about what's next for me, but I feel so blocked and so tired. When I seek advice, typically the response is go back to dance or travel. I'm so tired, I just want to rest. I honestly feel like I could focus solely on my recovery for the rest of my life and work sparingly. But I am on my own, with no family support or partner, so I need an income.

I feel really stuck and lost... what am I supposed to be doing? I enjoy spending time with my dog, doing yoga and meditation, and cleaning my home. Just a quiet simple existence that brings me a lot of peace.

What do y'all do? How do you manage recovery and work?

[AphoticAtramentous]

I feel really stuck and lost... what am I supposed to be doing? I enjoy spending time with my dog, doing yoga and meditation, and cleaning my home. Just a quiet simple existence that brings me a lot of peace.

I unfortunately can't give too much personal advice, but have you tried going to a work/training recruitment agency? When I finished high-school I signed up with one of these agencies and it helped me out immensely. They're usually pretty open to one's own needs and skills, so hopefully they could help?

Regards,
Aphotic.

[Cascade]

Oh boy, LadybugBee.  I am in almost the exact same boat as you.  AND struggling.  All I can offer is support and empathy.  I wish I had some answers!  Right now, I am focusing on me and trusting that the right next thing will come along at the right next time.  Scary, but it's all I can manage.

Here's a hug if that's okay,
   -Cascade