“The dots were just not being connected.”

[Three Roses]

Excellent article on Scarlett Franks, a young Australian woman living with cptsd - she has some very good insights.

https://www.mamamia.com.au/complex-childhood-trauma/

Some excerpts -

"I was receiving labels like anxiety, severe depression, mood disorders, eating disorders and self-harming disorders. All these disparate issues were being labeled and tackled in isolation," she told Mamamia. "And I was experiencing all these somatic symptoms like non-epileptic seizures, random unexplained vomiting, unexplained fainting, unexplained chronic pain.
---
And the diagnoses kept coming. Dissociative identity disorder, borderline personality disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder. Collecting them burdened Scarlett with a sense of helplessness; they located the problem within her, rather than the trauma she'd experienced.
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'Asked what it was like to be out of home, she paused.

"I don't know. It was a mixed experience, because there was both a sense of grief and fear, but also a sense of relief. And then there was guilt about that sense of relief.... "'
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"[Adolescence] is already a time when people are unsure of themselves, and to feel like you are imposing upon people, when you've already been told that your entire existence is an imposition on your family... it's like an existential crisis. It's a great sense of dread."
---
She was bounced from doctor to doctor, therapist to therapist, service to service, until at the age of 22, she'd saved enough money to get into a private outpatient care program.

There, she started to receive psychiatric explanations for what was happening to her, the full story of her mental health, and how her brain had adapted to her traumatic upbringing.

It's called 'structural dissociation'.

"When you've had to grow up with disorganised, chaotic caregivers, where your survival depends upon submerging yourself and trying to anticipate what they will do next, those parts of self become siloed, partitioned," she said. "This is a neurophysiological mechanism; it's not a metaphor."

[woodsgnome]

Thanks for pointing this out, Three Roses. These sorts of reads can be painful, but often contain meaningful perspectives regarding what was a hopeless situation.

"Submerging yourself" is a good descriptor for the 'what it felt like' part. This probably happens, to an extent, in many 'normal' families, but in cptsd the multiple abuses tilt the balance towards total confusion, fear, self-doubt, panic, and  .

[Three Roses]

Yup, that phrase "submerging yourself" resonated strongly with me!

[Kizzie]

Good article TR, tks!

Critically, Scarlett believes that much of the healthcare system and many mental health services aren't equipped to deal with cases like hers. She was bounced from doctor to doctor, therapist to therapist, service to service, until at the age of 22, she'd saved enough money to get into a private outpatient care program.

This kind of experience has become my Twitter crusade. I keep tweeting about the fact that CPTSD is just not widely enough recognized AND that medical and medical health care treatment, services and support are completely inadequate in most countries (and non-existent in 3rd world countries). 

This really has to change. 

[Three Roses]

This really has to change. 

👌👌👌