Tee’s 2nd try journal* trigger warning *

[Armee]

💛

[Snowdrop]

That's not exactly the response I hoped you'd get, but I think you did well to call them.

[Tee]

  USA City police suck.😔😣 If he makes it to my door step then it's too late to call 911
But rationally I it would be more likely for him too run and hide than to come here. But fear from trauma is real. 😣😔😥

[sanmagic7]

 

[Tee]

  thanks San

[Hope67]

Hi Tee,
I agree with you that fear from trauma is real.  I wish that the police had been more reassuring and helpful to you.  I am sorry that they weren't.  I hope you're ok, and I wanted to send you a hug of support 
Hope 

[Tee]

  thanks Hope that means a lot. At this point as far as I know they haven't even contacted him yet. So I'm freaking out for no reason.  I need to focus on getting through school. That's the next thing. It's was stupid of me to start another big stressor before this one was done.  I need to stop being stupid. I have 16 weeks to graduate I need to focus on that not on the dumb stuff that screwed me up in the first place.

[Armee]

(((((Tee))))))

You do know that what you did to report someone who abused you and did something criminal....that is not dumb. I know you know that. I know that what you did was hopeful and courageous, necessary, and super super scary. You did it anyway because it was the right thing to do, even with repercussions. You didn't have to do it though. You chose to do it because of who you are, and those are GOOD things, not dumb things.

Yes, the triggering and fear of that may make it very hard to move through your present life without hiccups,  including school. That's ok. Do your best to stay here and present and live your life you fought hard to survive into.

I like what you said:

At this point as far as I know they haven't even contacted him yet. So I'm freaking out for no reason.

Keep living right now as much as you can. Of course you will worry, panic, wonder why you reported, blame yourself. That's normal. But you are not to blame, you can get through 16 weeks of school, you can face this when it's time. You are brave. You are kind. You are capable. This is scary and you are doing it anyway. Be proud of yourself. You are doing something very very hard and you are going to get through it because you get through stuff.

[Hope67]

Hi Tee,
I also agree with Armee, and I think what you did was very hopeful and courageous.  I don't think it was stupid or dumb stuff, it was and is incredibly important.

Wishing you the best with getting through school.  16 weeks to graduate, you still have plenty of time, and I hope you have support and encouragement to achieve everything you wish to achieve, or which you want to do.


Hope 

[Tee]

  thanks Armee and Hope. The 16 weeks may prove harder than it should be. The stupid professor seems to think she doesn't have to follow the accommodations that by law I need for my PTSD.  I asked for clarification on the time frame of the second 8 weeks which is when I should be in clinicals and she responded she doesn't have a placement yet and probably won't be able to get me anything but a nursing home. Which I can't do because of triggers. She hates me and wants me to fail!

[sanmagic7]

i agree with armee and hope about the reporting.  very brave and courageous of you.   

one foot in front of the other for school.  you've got this!  love and hugs

[Tee]

  thanks San hope you are well sorry I don't have enough right now to read others journals. Know I'm thinking of you. And sending caring hugs.

[Armee]

Sending a wave and hug your way. 

[sanmagic7]

and right back atcha, my dear   .

i agree,   sounds like your professor is less than wonderful!  to the max!  geez, i hope things begin to go smoother for you.  love and hugs, tee.  i know you're with me, and i'm grateful for that.   

[Not Alone]

Tee, in case you pop onto OOTS, I just want you to know that I'm thinking of you. I hope you are well.
Not Alone