New to all this

[CactusFlower]

Hi there. You can call me Sage. I recently had some triggers bring up some memories about my "father" that were.... I don't actually remember anything before the age of 6. Let's just say dealing with one thing I did remember opened Pandora's box and some panic attacks over things I haven't remembered before happened. I started looking at the stuff and realized I spent pretty much my first 11 years in trauma and abuse. (I'm 50) I also had a mentally and emotionally abusive relationship for about 15 year's worth, so I've spent about half my life dealing with really bad situations.  I'm in a place now where I can work on it, and I just started today with a counselor who I think is gonna be good to work with. I don't look forward to dealing with this junk, but I look forward to getting better, if that makes sense. Yeah. So hi, nice to meet you all and realize I'm not alone in this.

Sage

[Alter-eg0]

Hi Sage,

Welcome!
I hope you find what you're looking for here

I recognize what you're saying, and I think it's a really good mindset going into the process. It's not fun by any means, and it sucks that it's even necessary to begin with, but on the other hand...it does give you the opportunity to heal and grow. 

Take care

[Blueberry]

Hi Sage  Welcome to the forum!