That lightbulb moment

[Eyessoblue]

Today is perhaps a day of celebration depending on how you look at it.
My posts here lately have been about my husband and I've finally accepted and realised I'm married to a narcissist and enabler who's been making me so much worse then I need to be.
He's actually been away this week and I've realised how much better I feel about myself and in general. I had a phone call from him earlier and it totally set  me back to how I was feeling.
So now I have to change it, I have to escape and I have to get out.
A major lightbulb moment but also one that fills me with dread and terror
Someone who manipulates beyond belief and will still control me for even when I've made that move, will manage to turn my children against me, but still I have to do it.
It's the new me it's the me I need to be it's what I have to do, but god I'm so scared and not sure where to start..........

[Rainagain]

This is going to be difficult for you eyessoblue, but you know what you have to do.

I wish you the strength and courage to do what is needed, thinking of you.

[Three Roses]

 My thoughts are with you as you walk through this. 

[the mirliton]

Someone who manipulates beyond belief and will still control me for even when I've made that move, will manage to turn my children against me, but still I have to do it.

Dear Eyessoblue, Yes it will be difficult...in so many ways, and yes your children might turn against you. That being said, try and remember that during the middle of all that you will need to go through, you will be be showing your children just how brave you are and also (this is really really important) that NO ONE absolutely NO ONE should stay in any type of situation that is harmful to their soul and well-being. You are worthy of kindness from friends, co-workers, strangers and especially yourSELF! What a wonderful gift for them to witness and see. Thank goodness for this forum  that you can reach out to 24/7!  It is your time shine.  p.s. I play this song~hopefully before I feel too low to want to uplift my mood~ and (at least for me) it really helps me to feel brave enough to do each day what I need and want to do. https://youtu.be/CjxugyZCfuw