Feeling cold, what emotion could it be?

[Gromit]

Before Christmas I heard that my sister (GC) had separated from her husband and moved. I sent a card, and had an exchange of messages with her, her indicating that she wanted to chat. Well, we did have a chat a few nights ago. I was just aware of how cold I felt physically afterwards and towards the end of the call. Yes, it is winter here, but I was colder than that. I am not sure what emotion, if any, that is evidence of. I felt nervous, she did too. Was it cold from fear? It was not the same physical feeling I get with shame.

We had not spoken for some time. Her husband had had various bright ideas on how to help us both, which, when acted upon, made things worse and, in his words, I had 'burnt my bridges with my sister'.

Any help in deciphering physical feelings and making sense of them in an emotional way gratefully received.

Gromit

[Armee]

I'm not sure but I seem to get very cold with intense fear.

[rainydiary]

Sometimes I have found it helpful to look at a list of feeling words to see if one stands out to me.  The list below has been helpful to me as it breaks down words into when our needs are satisfied and when they aren't.  There is another page that lists needs as well.

https://www.cnvc.org/training/resource/feelings-inventory

[Kizzie]

I often get quite cold when I am afraid.  I wonder if it's because of what happened when her H was in the picture in which case would reconnecting pose a bit of danger?

[Gromit]

I often get quite cold when I am afraid.  I wonder if it's because of what happened when her H was in the picture in which case would reconnecting pose a bit of danger?

Now you mention it, it was similar to the first time I tried the couch in my psychotherapy sessions, the therapist kept suggesting it, so I tried it, I got so cold, my teeth were almost chattering, or trying to. The therapist was unaware and seemed to find it very significant when I stopped trying the couch. I did not feel safe on the couch.

I have not always felt safe with my sister, she has betrayed me in the past and yes, I do not know how much that was to do with her H or just her.  She seemed quite nervous and probably right to be so, she has been rude and unpleasant to me in the past, perhaps she is aware of that, at the time, I just thought it was a continuation of how my family treated me, that I did not matter.

Thanks for all the comments,

G

[Gromit]

I'm not sure but I seem to get very cold with intense fear.

Yes, the comments here have reminded me of the time I felt the same, trying the couch out in therapy.

Thank you,

G