self sabotage(hope this is the right board)

[1lovecoffee+stars74]

I self sabotage a lot. I find education hard for lots of reasons. (Im a mature student) But sometimes I don't help myself and i don't learn.

I always run out of steam near the end of a project. I have really screwed up and i think ill be re-doing my project in the summer. I havent contacted my tutor yet, but i got some advice off other students. That was as much as I can handle.

I normally just hand in and move on. This time i took extenuating circumstances claim (10extra days). Which i didn't need all of. It should have just been a safty net. Its the first time I have ever taken extended time. And i just couldn't motivate myself. And i missed the hand in. How did i do that? I got 85% ( an A) on the first part of the project.

I lose motivation a lot and ill end up playing on the Xbox or watching tv. Doing work becomes hard. I cant think of how to complete a task. My brain goes fuzzy. I don't know what to do. Then a day before I suddenly know what to do and how to do it. Its always really obvious.

I really need to stop doing this, but i don't know how.

[Blueberry]

I self-sabotage too. Don't have the wherewithal to explain what is probably behind it in my case. Just wanted to let you know you're not alone.

[1lovecoffee+stars74]

Thank you, i needed that

I self-sabotage too. Don't have the wherewithal to explain what is probably behind it in my case. Just wanted to let you know you're not alone.

[Kizzie]

Could it also be that you're dealing with the ups and downs of trauma which as we all know here it often steals energy and focus and causes the fuzzy brain you describe?  One thing that helps a lot of us is to be aware of the drain on us because of our trauma, become aware of the warning signs, destress wherever possible and build in rest periods. 

I take a break every day for an hour in a quiet dark room and if/when I feel my stress going up I take out whatever tasks/events I can to relieve the pressure. 

I've found it also helps to talk about how you're feeling, like you're doing here.      Is student counseling avail at your institution?  My son had to take a leave of absence from his studies and  his university was really helpful. 

Hope some of this is helpful