Drowning before reaching the other side...

[TxiaHoria55]

I exactly feel like that. I feel like after all the swiming and working, I'm dwrowning before being able to reach the other shore.
These days I feel so tired and overwhelmed. I feel like everything happens all at once: examns, homneworks, job shifts, paper work, searching for a therapist (finding a fairy would me easier!)...
And I try, I try so hard to do everything that needs to be done and to take care of my self. But each time is like I'm falling behind something, and I just want to sleep. And when things seem to get a little bit better (for example, finding finally a therapist!)...
But then you fail your exam.
That exam I had studied so hard for and that I though I did ok. And it's just a little exam, just a pebble in comparison to all the other problems I have. But it weights so much between that little pebble and all the other ones, and I feel so sad, so tired, and so mad I make such a big deal about it!
It's just so tiring to be allays fighting against something, always trying to heal, and heal, and then fail at healing, and trying all over again. My whole life has felt like a battle field, and I just want things to go smoothly for once. And to not feel like I'm drowning each time something like this happens...
Sorry for the long...what ever this even is.
I just feel so alone right now.

[NarcKiddo]

I am sorry you are struggling.

It's good that you have felt able to post about it here. You are not alone. Climb aboard our little life raft and rest a while before continuing your swim. You will get there.

 

[Blueberry]

I'm sorry it's so hard rn. I've been where you are before. Hang in there, it does get better millimetre by millimetre. 

[TxiaHoria55]

Thank you so much! It makes me feel less alone

[Kizzie]

You really are not alone TxiaHoria55.  We do understand how you feel, it's so much a part of having Complex PTSD to be overwhelmed by life sadly.  Fortunately you can come here and we will get what you're saying and will do our best to let you know we feel for you.  Be kind to yourself