Quitting Smoking with difficult partner

[RanOnEmpty]

Hey everyone,

I guess I'm writing this in the hope of mustering some willpower to quit smoking cigarettes. I've been smoking for about 20 years, though I quit for 1 entire year several years ago. The past year I've been able to stay quit for several weeks at a time, even broke most of my habits around smoking after eating, before bed, etc.

But my wife and I have been fighting more frequently than usual the past month or so, and in the past two weeks I've gotten back to full-blown addiction. I don't want to blame her for my own self-control issues, but our fights are without a doubt the main reason I haven't been able to quit smoking (She smokes, too, but she's the type that can go without quite easily). This isn't the place to get into the history or the circumstances, but let's just say that this post could just as easily be in Disturbed Relationships. I get irritable, she has a short fuse in general, I EF when I hear yelling, I smoke and hate myself. It's happened a thousand times.

Tomorrow I plan to make another quit attempt, and I really hope I don't snap out and smoke  . How can I deal with CPTSD, relationship stress, and cravings all at once?

[AphoticAtramentous]

Hey RanOnEmpty,

I wish I could offer some real advice but alas I don't have the experience of tackling an addiction like that. The only thing I can think of is to maybe set small bite sized goals. Like.. don't smoke for a day. And when that day is over, don't smoke for a day. Try not to see it as a mountain, but rather stepping stones. Feel free to brush this advice aside though, again, I don't have the experience myself. But I do express my sympathies, it must all be incredibly difficult. Even if you do "snap out and smoke", please don't hold it against yourself. Cigarettes are so nefarious...

Regards,
Aphotic.