Struggling and grateful

[TreeVines]

Hi - I'm 45, wife wanted a divorce last July and I fibally got the courage to go to a real therapist. I was diagnosed with COTSD about two months ago and while it's been painful to dig up the past, it's helped immensely with my relationship with my children.

I think my relationship with my wife is gone, and it hurts so much to know that if I had this diagnosis earlier I probably wouldn't be getting divorced. Do the regret runs deep.

Thsnk you for creating this community as it seems to be thriving.

[NarcKiddo]

Welcome. I am sorry your marriage ended in divorce, but glad that you have gone to a therapist and that your relationship with your children is improving.

Wishing you all the best for your continued healing.

[Hope67]

Hi TreeVines,
I would also like to wish you the best for your continued healing, and I'm glad you found your way here.  Welcome 
Hope 

[Papa Coco]

TreeVines,

I'm sorry to hear of your divorce and how it has affected you. I have a problem with remorse myself too. I tend to regret everything my CPTSD has made me do over 6 decades.

I find a lot of comfort in a single quote that was given to us by the late-great Maya Angelou. She said, "Do the best you can until you know better. When you know better, do better."

That quote tells me that I'm not the only person on earth who struggles with hanging onto my past struggles, and that it's okay for me to let go of the regret, look forward, and do better with what I've learned from the past. The quote is on my wall above my computer monitor because I need to look at it often. The more I look at it, the more self-love and purpose it gives me.

I'm very glad you found this forum. I hope that your interactions here bring you peace and a sense of belonging to others who know what it feels like to live with the ups and downs of trauma disorders.

Welcome.