Obligatory Intro-deal

[Martin Brody]

*possible triggers for neglect, and sexual/emotional abuse*

Hello, all. You can call me by my username or by Ire, I'll answer to both.

I'm a female-presenting, genderfluid, adult (pronouns:she/he, I have no preference unless otherwise stated) who only recently put a name to my lifelong illness. It was only after things got so bad I could no longer work or leave the house that I found out.

My parents knew more than "just depression" (as they put it) was going on since I was in single didgets but intentionally kept it from me. I blindly rushed into dangerous situations and patterns as I grew up, and thus additional trauma. They (my parents) continue to not acknowledge any of the instances where I was sexually assaulted, or my mother's emotionally violent narcissism which continues to trigger me, as well as holding our whole family hostage.

I've been a member of a lot of mental illness support forums but never felt anything really clicked with what I was going through like I saw things click for others. I like to listen and offer support as much as I like receiving it, but I must admit I am very isolated and have been thirsting for some validation, acceptance, visbility... for a long time. As I said before, I only recently discovered CPTSD was a thing and that I have it.

I'm eager to get to know you folks, offer support, educate myself, and do my best to work on recovery. Thank you for your time.

likes: cats, animation, Halloween
dislikes: rudeness, willful ignorance, celery

[Dutch Uncle]

Hi Ire 

Welcome to Out of the Storm! At OOTS, we welcome people who are dealing with cPTSD through a variety of life's events that befell us. As such, you may find you 'fit in' just fine.

In the cPTSD Glossary you may find a lot that may resonate with your experiences. A few highlights to start your journey with:
On cPTSD
On Boundaries

And last but not least: Guidelines for All Members and Guests

Welcome again, I hope and wish this place and community will give you comfort and be of aid on your journey through cPTSD. We are looking forward as well to get to know you, are welcoming your support and hope to give you some along the way as well.


Dutch Uncle.

PS: If your name is [your current user name] in real life as well, we suggest you change it on the site here to protect your privacy. A bit more anonymous nickname may contribute to a bigger sense of safety for you.

edit: thanks for answering that question

[Martin Brody]

Thank you very much.

For your own piece of mind by the way, Martin Brody is not my real name. Thank you for your concern, though. It's actually a reference to the main character in Jaws. An apt analogy for me personally, and my cPTSD.

[Dutch Uncle]

 

Now I remember: "Chief Brody". 
Well, we HAVE a bigger boat. Hop on. 

[Kizzie]

Hi and a warm welcome to OOTS Martin     It sounds like you have been up against a lot without knowing for a long time quite what was going on.  Finding out about PD's and CPTSD can be both a blessing and a blow, a relief, but something that can rock you back on your heels.  Have you found that?

I also went to various groups and never quite felt I fit in, but here and at our sister site Out of the Fog I did, how glorious not to be alone with all the craziness (internal and external) any more! It can really help in terms of recovery so I hope you find a similar sense of belonging, comfort, information, and support here