what's next recovery journal

[NarcKiddo]

I'm sorry you're struggling with sweats. I had a couple of years of dealing with really nasty drenching night sweats - in my case due to menopause issues. I found it more comfortable to sleep in light long-sleeved cotton jersey or bamboo PJs and have spares by the bedside to change quickly into fresh. I hated the thought of turning over the pillow and letting the sweat leach into the sheet below so I kept spare pillows around so I could throw the wet pillow on the floor and grab a dry one. I also at times slept on a bath towel so when I woke up with that all wet I could throw it off and have a dry sheet underneath - or just swap it out for another bath towel. It is very tiresome to deal with but in terms of not disrupting sleep too much I found it useful to have all these things easy to grab so I could make any changes with minimal wakefulness.

I hope you feel better soon. The illness cannot be helping.

[WhatsNext]

Hi NarcoKiddo

Thank you for the well wishes.  The sweats that got to the point of disrupting sleep came in about 6 days ago.  Before then I would have sweated but usually I would sleep through the night and only notice the sweat in passing when I woke up. 

I tried all kinds of things until I ended up with being in my skivvies with a flat sheet. 100% cotton in a percale weave. I was at a point where something needed to be different so I could get enough sleep.   I'd had to shut off the AC vent as well since that cold air when I'm in a sweat seems freezing at the time.  and currently I've very sensitive to the temps of what I drink / eat.  Which does support my concept that the stress hormones and long term effects negatively impact every single system the human body has and as the body attempts to recover weird things happen. With the exclusion of menopause / andropause.  I also think that the negative effects from the high allostatic load can also influence the system to where chronic conditions can become prevalent.  Like in my case of non-structural hypertension. Yep the unremitting level of crapola and the body adjusted to operate at a higher set point. 

The being under the weather hasn't gotten worse thank goodness, some small improvements in longer periods where the nose is clearer / clear.  Less coughs over all. 

Until another time.

[WhatsNext]

Update on the sleeping situation.  Was able to get a solid 7 with 0 the sweats    woke chilled but not clammy, no sweat trying to evap.  I wonder if my current feeling of being chilled has something related to not having some food on my stomach?  Hm..

Did get some stream of consciousness writing done today as well.  I'm still shocked at times at the sheer amount of processes? thought threads? something that are running under the surface.  Somewhere in there I've done some work taking a look at the dynamics of the person in the role of father in the adoptive family.  He was my Dad.  He was fully human.  saint and sinner in one package.  just like all of us humans.  I know a lot of his history and I can "see" how he ended up as the person he was when I knew him.  He had a lot of enabling going on.  I don't know if that was inherent or if it was from the death of 10,000 paper cuts that happens sometimes in marriages.  Taking myself as an example.  There is sadness around him, he had some intense challenges in his life even as a child with the death of his mother, Father couldn't? keep the farm going so,  then riding the rails seeking work, being taken in as a foundling, and serving in WW2 and supposedly he saw action.  What I remember on the good side is that he saw me, the only adult at the time that was honest enough to tell a child that they didn't know about something and that I should look it up or figure it out and tell him.  His exit point was 45 years ago.  Terrible traffic accident.  So terrible that the service was closed casket.  I still miss the physical of him.


I'm uncertain with the level of sovereignty that I currently have.  I still do the work thing but outside of that constraint .. there appears to be a lot of possible choices that really aren't "big" like changing jobs. 

I think I'm going to take me a morning walk so I can get some morning sunshine. 

Until another time.