Hope's Journal 2026

[sanmagic7]

hope, i'm so jazzed for you about how you managed to get your sewing machine working.  congrats on that!  i have one which has been sitting for 2 yrs., too anxious to use it.  not sure what i'm scared of, but i can't get myself to sew, and i used to make the majority of my clothes and for my daughters as well.  so, it's wonderful to see you 'tame the beast' so to speak, go to references when needed, and accomplish the job.  well done!!!   love and hugs

[Marcine]

That's fantastic, Hope! I've been there too and those YouTube videos can really save the day. I relate with feeling daunted and doing it anyway. The good feeling of a successful sewing project.

(A geeky sidebar, if interested: several years ago I passed along my electric sewing machine when I had the chance to adopt and rebuild a foot-powered Singer. It was pretty decrepit and had been abandoned for years in a leaking garage. Scraping clean the serial number and lo and behold! Singer maintains the online database still and this beautiful machine was made on July 2, 1906...!

But even more amazing to me— with some basic mechanical rebuilding, degreasing and oiling, a bit of research on how to purchase a new leather loop that transfers power from the foot treadle — this beautiful machine that only runs 1 stitch, no back stitch, no fancy zig zag, no electrical power— is the best sewing machine I've ever worked with. Smooth and even stitches, a pleasure to sew on. It was built to last and it has.

I found the original advertisement for the machine— "a faithful friend"... ! Oh be still, my heart.

So, as I was working on reviving this machine, I felt its friendliness, its loyalty to service over many decades. I do love machines and I have an active imagination... I believe it was grateful to be taken care of, as a faithful friend deserves.

I had moments of doubt and concern about the project, especially when all the parts were loose on the workbench...

I did receive encouragement from the machine itself as I heard,
"It doesn't have to be Prissy Perfect."
"It's ok not to know."
"Take your time."
"Thank you for taking care of me."
"Don't fret. Relax and breathe."

Our faithful friendship endures.)

[Hope67]

Hi SanMagic, Thanks for sharing your feelings about sewing machines - it's helpful to hear because I also used to be able to use one many years back - but somehow I've developed quite a triggered relationship to it all - and when I went to that sewing class I didn't feel confident at all about what I was doing or trying to do - but I am so thankful that I am tackling it and making some progress with it.  I don't really understand why it changed, but clearly it did.  Hugs to you 

Hi Marcine, Wow, I found your experiences with that lovely sewing machine that you nurtured back to life to be really poignant.  Those words of encouragement you heard from the machine, they made inner parts of me feel a whell of emotion - it was really powerful - it felt really special that it spoke to you like that, and that a faithful friendship was enabled to endure.  Really inspiring and thank you for sharing it.   

[NarcKiddo]

Well done for sticking with it and getting the repair done. 

[dollyvee]

Congrats on getting the sewing machine to work Hope 

[Hope67]

Hi NarcKiddo and Dolly,
Thank you both so much   

***********
30th May 2026
So it's the final weekend in May.  I am intending to do some relaxing things, as it's still hot weather - although thankfully the heatwave is said to be officially over.  I felt particularly tired and a bit unwell yesterday - my head hurt, and I took a painkiller tablet - thankfully I slept much better last night, and I do feel more refreshed and better generally today.  So that's good!

I bought some flowers this morning as a treat for myself - they will bring me a lot of pleasure, and they are beautiful.  I think that was an act of kindness to myself - I wanted to achieve something like that, and it feels good to have done that.

I also hope to reflect on the weekend about what direction I want to take my reading and my processing of stuff.  I recognise that I can end up going off on tangents sometimes, and then get de-stabilised from a route that is one I want to follow.  I'm hoping to maybe jot down a few notes, and have some focus for the month of June.  That's the plan, as I think about it today.

But I also want to really relax this weekend, and re-charge my batteries.  Be kind to myself.  I'll put the symbol  here, as I hope to achieve that feeling and have some nice moments of peace and tranquility. 

[zen_racer]

I also hope to reflect on the weekend about what direction I want to take my reading and my processing of stuff.  I recognise that I can end up going off on tangents sometimes, and then get de-stabilised from a route that is one I want to follow.  I'm hoping to maybe jot down a few notes, and have some focus for the month of June.  That's the plan, as I think about it today.

But I also want to really relax this weekend, and re-charge my batteries.  Be kind to myself.  I'll put the symbol  here, as I hope to achieve that feeling and have some nice moments of peace and tranquility. 

Hope, moments of peace and tranquility do sound like a wonderful goal this weekend, I'm hoping to find that myself.  I like that you've done something nice for yourself in buying the flowers.  I imagine that's a treat for something beautiful to look at and smell, as well as the sense of being nice to yourself.

I especially liked the part I quoted.  I also tend to veer off on tangents and end up misdirecting my own energies.  Taking time to reflect on your own intent and helping yourself to stay focused is a great example that I think I may follow.

I hope both of our weekends are refreshing and recharging.

I'm happy to remove this if it bothers you in any way, but sending hugs. 

[sanmagic7]

hope, i hope your weekend was just what you wanted, and you're starting a new month more refreshed and energized.  i just picked some wild daisies this morning - i do love fresh flowers in the house.  they always lift my spirits as well, so i think it's absolutely correct to think of your flowers as an act of kindness to yourself.  well done!  love and hugs

[NarcKiddo]

I hope you had a relaxing weekend. 

[Hope67]

Hi Zen_racer - I hope you had a refreshing and recharging weekend, and thank you so much for what you wrote.  I do appreciate the hug too, so thank you, and sending one back to you 

Hi SanMagic - Wild daisies sound so lovely - yes, fresh flowers in the house do lift spirits.  Thank you - I am enjoying my flowers very much 

Hi NarcKiddo - Thank you so much 

**********
3rd June 2026
I wanted to come back here a few times in the past days, but I couldn't for various reasons - and even now I've just got back here now, I have something I need to attend to - so I'll hope to pop back in a bit.  I do want to write more today.

[Hope67]

I don't think I'm  going to be able to get back today to write anything substantive - so I'll just pop back when I can later in the week. 

[Hope67]

I have been clearing out some things - going through old papers and shredding things.  I've just been re-reading some communications from my sister.  It's made me think I might want to contact her again - BUT, I need to think carefully about that, as it's not worked very well to try to communicate previously. 

I realise that clearing some things out and shredding some papers - that's probably swirled up some stuff for me.  I know that part of today I felt as if I was 'frozen' and couldn't action things - I turned to trying some physical activity, and that did move it on.  Then I was quite productive after that.

I was also shredding papers connected to my work career.  That feels a bit 'freeing' somehow.  I'm surprised by how that feels.  I'd hung on to some of those papers for a long time.  But somehow shredding them, wow - it does feel liberating.

I'd wanted to look back over recent months and write something about summarising and planning for June - but it's already June, and somehow I'm just thinking - why plan it so much.  Just experience it.  See what happens.  Allow yourself to enjoy your retirement - why don't you just do that!?

I read a book that was a Biography about 'Gwyneth Paltrow' which was written by Amy Odell.  Might have got her name wrong... Not sure.  Anyway, it caused me to have really vivid dreams - as it seemed to open up the whole period of time when I was in my 20's and 30's.  It was like bits and pieces were really coming into focus somehow.  It was interesting.  I think I had really got involved in films from that time as a way to 'escape' - so reading about an actress who was in some of those films from that time, that was quite powerful.

I've started to read a fiction book today as well - and I enjoyed it so far.  This is unusual for me - I normally gravitate to non-fiction, but I am thrilled to find I don't mind this book so far.  Infact reading it, I found that it was comforting to parts of myself, and that was nice.

Glad to have written this today.

[HannahOne]

Hope I love that you bought flowers for yourself!! You inspired me to do the same. It makes a difference in the house.

I related to your going through papers and shredding. It makes sense that it would bring up feelings and thinking about contacting people. I'm very involved in doing the same and cleaning out my attic and garage. I want my current house to reflect me. And it did bring up some feelings of wanting to contact people that in my case, I shouldn't. I'm so glad you found some of the shredding liberating! And that you could enjoy a good book.