Wanted Someone Who Gets It

[bardic]

Hi everyone 👋 I joined this forum because I don't think online spaces for mental health/trauma recovery just "get" me, & it made me feel alienated.

I've watched a time when mental illness & trauma were treated as so rare that one was supposedly exaggerating if they're struggling with it. But now it's common enough to be both so hypercommercial/profitable & simultaneously so minimized/banalized.

Where I live, public mental healthcare still relied on very basic approaches (ie. CBT for almost anything, couples therapy frameworks that can't reliably detect abuse, limited choice of psychiatric meds) that I don't think it'll ever reliably treat anyone with complex comorbidities like mine. But private/alternate/commercial solutions are inaccessible & wildly varied in quality.

I also didn't really fit in recovery spaces because I've experienced psychiatric & therapeutic abuse as well as medical racism, which made me critical of applying current approaches of mental health to my own self; if not at least wary of "one size fits all" claims. People seemed to assume that if I tell them about my challenges with an approach, it must have meant they needed to stop relying on it? Which wasn't my intent. I sincerely hope everyone will find an approach that works on them. But it's so dehumanizing if I needed to center others' comfort when I was telling them about the current frameworks leaving out someone like me. Besides, I'm not anti-mental wellness or anti-science or whatever. I consider identifying what the scope & limits of an approach/tool as responsible use of it.

[TheBigBlue]

Welcome bardic

I'm glad you found us. I think I understand what you are saying: an approach not working for you, or even harming you, doesn't mean you are saying it cannot help someone else. One shoe obviously doesn't fit all of us, especially with something as complex and individual as trauma.

I also really liked what you said about understanding the scope and limitations of an approach being part of using it responsibly. Being able to talk honestly about where something doesn't fit shouldn't require reassuring everyone else that it's okay if it fits them.

Here in the US, new guidelines for treating complex trauma published in 2024 specifically emphasize that treatment should be individualized and may need to be multimodal. Yet all I was offered was CBT ... which has, for the most part, been helpful for me ... but anything beyond that has been on my own initiative (and not covered by insurance). So the gap between what we recognize people may need and what is actually available can be pretty substantial.

I hope you will feel understood here.

[Kizzie]

Just in case you or anyone wants to see the guidelines TBB is talking about they're here.  There are seven guidelines which are more client centred and relational in nature (hurrah!) as follows:

Psychologists may utilize the acronym HISTORY as a memory prompt for the current seven guidelines when providing interventions, care, and support to persons who have experienced transdiagnostic mental health problems in response to complex trauma histories. The guidelines regard: (1) Humanistic, (2) Integrative, (3) Sequential, (4) Temporal, (5) Outcomes-focused, and (6) Relational principles, while assisting clients' in understanding (7) Why the traumatic events occurred.

Given they were only published in 2024 (and CPTSD is not an official diagnosis in the APA DSM yet which is interesting), it is likely they will take a while to work their way into healthcare education programs, professional development curricula, and clinical practice.

It's on the horizon though and that was not the case when this web site and forum started 11 years ago.  Since then there has been a proliferation of research regarding CPTSD and complex trauma. Unfortunately as you touch on, there have also been all manner of people with little to no training hanging out their shingles and we must wade through them to find a competent, trained therapist who has more than one tool in their toolbox. My hope is this will change and in the near rather than far future.

In the meantime, you have us and we do get it     

[NarcKiddo]

But now it's common enough to be both so hypercommercial/profitable & simultaneously so minimized/banalized. 

Yes. One the one hand I am really pleased to see the huge proliferation of awareness of CPTSD. But it certainly comes at a cost.

Welcome to OOTS.

[Gently]

ie. CBT for almost anything, couples therapy frameworks that can't reliably detect abuse

Hello and welcome, bardic. I can relate to all you say, especially the above.

And it does come at a cost, our need to be out there finding our own resources and answers and support.

I feel so grateful to all of those who have contributed to the public dialogue about CPTSD and for what I have been able to find for myself online, and for this forum.

[bardic]

Thank you everyone for the warm welcome! 🎉 I thought I was in trouble, given the number of replies 😆 but I appreciated people coming out with similar experiences.

And what Kizzie & TBB said about the field of CPTSD research coming up with major overhaul/breakthroughs especially in the last ~5 years is really reassuring, especially the need to acknowledge contexts (especially one that therapy might have previously deemed "irrelevant" or "out-ot-scope". For me, that would be influences of systemic injustices) & a perspective reorientation that one's treatment might be multimodal without it being interpreted as "failure" somehow. I'm currently reading the 2024 APA pdf being shared (thanks Kizzie!), it's definitely not too mainstream of an understanding yet, I can already tell some reflexive assumptions I made when helping myself with trauma need updating!

(Oddly 2024 was the year I experienced my most severe therapeutic abuse yet, & a major part of it was because my provider didn't have this understanding yet, in addition to unethical conduct. I hold out the hope more & more people, both providers & survivors, have an updated understanding that would support & dignify them. So thank you OOTS for being a public space where we can have ongoing solidarity despite of growing awareness!)