self hatred *trigger warning*

[Blueberry]

  to you hurtbeat. It sounds as if you're in a bit of a better place, I mean by your last post compared to when you were looking for the group. I'm glad about that for you.

[hurtbeat]

Thanks blueberry 
Well.. whatever feelings we have it's impossible to keep them at the same high level for a longer period of time.
Eventually it's going to have to pass into a more mellow state and I suppose that's where I am now.

[Candid]

Oh yeah, I'm fine (and usually find my way easily ) if no one's expecting me. It's appointments that have me rehearsing, checking maps and very often, not sleeping the night before.