Justin's CPTSD Recovery Journal Start 7/24/18

[ajvander86]

Hi all,

It's been a while since I've been here, I've been really busy trying to put together a business for myself that works with my cptsd and also allows me to stop working low paying jobs for stress reasons. 

My life has felt so incredibly difficult, painful, and frustratingly complicated the entire time due to this cptsd from narcissistic abuse.  I'm honestly worn out.  I would have loved nothing more than to be able to finish college like a normal person and be in a nice career with a wife and family.  I don't know, maybe my cptsd is my destiny. 

I've found some great resources for healing from cptsd mainly other people who have endured narcissistic abuse or personality disordered abuse, and Inner Integration with Meredith Miller which has been helping a lot. 

I'm finding myself tired of not only being isolated socially but of also attracting unhealthy people into my life, being a codependent as well, like more narcissists or just emotionally unhealthy people in general.  So it's kind of like my isolation and lack of trusting people is actually the right thing to do because of the type of people I attract, but now I recognize more clearly how important it is for me to work on my self healing and self care.

My business I'm creating is designed to help others with cptsd and emotional abuse (not doing any advertising here just saying what I'm doing lol), so I'm excited about that.  Spreading awareness of how to heal from cptsd and narcissistic abuse I feel is a large part of my life path and I'm looking forward to getting it going. 

I'm going to try to be more consistent with my visits to this page from now on and to connect with more people.  I'd love to talk with anyone who's interested btw!  Until next time.

[Blueberry]

It's good to see you back. It sounds as if you're making some progress and have found tools to help yourself   

[Andyman73]

Justin, hey man, CPTSD isn't your destiny. Just a scar to carry along the journey to your destiny. I do hope you meet a lovely lady who has the depth of compassion and kindness you need. And that y'all will build a wonderful future together.

I also hope your business takes off and is successful and provides more than enough financial security for your whole life.