New year rehaul

[Boatsetsailrose]

I've been v overwhelmed with my recovery lately...
I do 12 step for addictions
Psychology for cptsd
And medical for fibro/cfs

I have a super fast brain that think think thinks a lot.. I move rapidly from one thing to the next with no stopping..
Books, articles, on line, you tube, forums, people, meetings, writings etc etc... =overwhelm..
Info overload and going no where..

I HAVE to simplify or I am going to go mad (if I haven't already)...

The other area is my creativity.. I keep looking and thinking of the reasons why I don't allow my passions to come into ignition... I have ideas but don't really know...
Who cares! Its like when I work it out then that will give me the permission.. NO

I just Need to start something and be consistent... Do the journey..
I'm a dancing, drawing, painting, creating, singing closet queen.

So new plan :

SIMPLIFY
CREATE
CONSISTENTLY

[Hope67]

Hi Boatsetsailrose,
I really relate to what you wrote here - I find it hard to begin anything creative, and I am going to heed your words to 'simplify, create consistently' it sounds like great advice, and I would like to wish you the best for your new plan.
Good luck with everything.
Hope 

[Boatsetsailrose]

Thanks Hope
I have started doing  the artists way workbook and have gotten my sketch pad out too... Progress..

[BeautifulCrazy]

Boatsetsailrose

Hooray for your progress and commitment to yourself!


Your original post made me lol. That's me to a T!!
The part that made me gasp was this:

I keep looking and thinking of the reasons why I don't allow my passions to come into ignition... I have ideas but don't really know...
Who cares! Its like when I work it out then that will give me the permission.. NO

I just Need to start something and be consistent... Do the journey..

Oh my gosh.

I thinkthinkthink...
I have good ideas! intentions! plans!....
I thinkthinkthink some more...
I read! research! immerse! oversaturate! overwhelm! and thinkthinkthinkoverthink!
When really, like you said...

I. Just. Need. To. Start. Something.

Yup that felt like a punch in the gut.... lol. So obvious! And that goofy, overused quote about a journey of however many miles beginning with a single step.....    Ooof! Sudden, visceral understanding.
And then, practically right after, you said...

Do. The. Journey.

Do it. That doesn't mean plan it! read about it! research it! argue with myself about all the possible outcomes! whys! and why nots! wherefores! and doubt! and fears! and insecurity! and fearfearfear! and all in my head! do it! overdo it! and now it is so done! and now I am so done with it!


I need to just (gently) take the first step (however small) on the journey. Put on the red Nikes and Just Do It.

Thank you for the simplification and the kick in the pants!!
I wish you every joy, and lots of forward momentum on your dancing, drawing, painting, creating, singing closet queen self stuff!! I am cheering you on!
~BC

[Phoebes]

Boats,

I very much relate to what you wrote, especially about creativity. I'm in the same "boat" right now . I'm approaching it as just scheduling a disciplined time to DO art, no matter what it is, and allow being in the flow of creativity to serve as therapy for me. As well as a diversion from bad habits, a pattern change, a brain chemical high..

I'm excited for you in your new mindset and look forward to seeing what 2020 will bring for you!

[Boatsetsailrose]

Beautiful crazy
I love your sharing and that you found u in the original post with some solution to the complex brain of cptsd..

Quote
'I need to just (gently) take the first step (however small) on the journey. Put on the red Nikes and Just Do It'

Fabulous! Ah that's what I may need some red nikeys 

Good news this end I did a little drawing, am reading one page of the artists way each nite (whether I want to or not) and enquired into a studio space to do art.
Also I have just got a place in a body art show as a model!

[Boatsetsailrose]

Hi phoebe's good on you sounds you've made commitment and are sticking to it. We deserve special time right?
Yes flow of creativity, getting out of left hand brain just being... I think that's the issue on some level I don't believe it's OK to just be and not be productive with important things! Oh dear silly brain

[woodsgnome]

I'm been enjoying the 'art therapy' posts on here and have noted especially the excitement of supporting one's own therapy through creating thoughtful expressive art, for its own sake (and ours).

It all reminds me of a book I read years ago, where I've forgotten most of the drier suggestions, except for one which stood out: "Stay Open and Play with Options." In my own case, I was always hampered ever since I was violently punished by an abuser/'teacher' upset with my early attempt at art. Somehow, I still found ways to express via other art forms: namely music and performance (acting). Then I found ways to play with art (play is such a good word in therapy) during a 'recovery' workshop a couple years back.

Anyway, thanks for pointing this out via these threads, Phoebes, Boatsetsailrose, and Beautiful Crazy.

[Boatsetsailrose]

Hi woodgnome
I so relate to your post..
My early experiences were of firstly being smacked on my backside by a teacher (and I wet myself) when I was in primary school for spilling some paint..
I remember it like it was yesturday I was sent to the lost property to put on these awful 70s brown trousers.. The humiliation as well as the wrath of being smacked and shamed only came out when I did some of the workbook 'the artists way' julia Cameron. I've just recently bought her book again it's so fabulous for becoming creatively free.
I also remember getting shouted at by another teacher when I was a bit older for doing a stitch wrong in sewing..
Thank god things have moved on since the 70s!

Play is such a good a good word I agree when it comes to creative ty and the arts!
Good to hear u found some ways to express and then play via the workshop. I love how much is on offer now days with therapeutic activity..
I was just talking with a friend about playing with the art the other day and so we agreed we shall meet sometimes at each others houses and just give space  play!
Things seem to be cracking open this end since I've been setting the focus and intention..
I just did my first performance on stage since I was at school and loved it!
Started drawing..
I've also after 2 yrs of agonising finally found inside myself through some healing I had exactly what I am going to do creatively to set my own thing up combining my 2 loves children and performing