IFS Therapy Conversations

[Armee]

I'm really sorry Dolly. I'll think about my replies carefully to try to not come across that way as denying others' experiences or trying to get my way. I truly intended it only as what works for me and what I am getting tripped up on. You are of course right about the IFS pieces. What I was getting at was yes my own personal issue (as in I see this is my issue, to be worked on and improved on) with the experts, not fellow travelers. I apologize because it seems like my communication style is not quite right in how I am engaging here.   

[dollyvee]

Kizzie I think that's a very good point that we are told one way is supposed to work and people take it to heart that it doesn't, or there's something wrong with them. I think I felt that way in therapy as well with my first therapist. I'm sorry you had those experiences with EMDR because I think it helped me a lot.

Armee - thank you for your response. We're all just people here trying to deal with trauma the best we can in the end. 

[Kizzie]

Dolly and Armee - I just love that you two worked things out     

[dollyvee]

Prompted by this conversation and some of my own experiences rercently with dissociation, I listened to this podcast and it brought up some good points as well as strong reactions in me.

IFS and Dissociation with Joanne Twombly
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vULDIjUq75A

 - One of the biggest aha moments/reactions was that - dissociative parts are/can be related to secret parts and that having parts be secret is what helped us survive childhood. This is also the sense that I got from an exile that just sort of popped up, that she was all the (good) qualities that had to hide away in order to survive. What surprised me was that I always thought exiles would carry pain but she didn't seem to carry any of that.

- Interviewee was commenting that if a kid gets into Self in a dysfunctional family, they get their feet kicked out from under them. So, you want to hide Self which can then be one of the difficulties in accessing it.

- Sometimes Self is not enough (see above) because there are difficulties accessing Self. There could also be compliant parts who say that they are in Self but then unable/unaware that they are dissociated, meaning they can't take on the burdens not overwhelm (*as I understand it*). Feel this is true to me where as a young baby you experienced trauma/overwhelm, so Self got pushed out early. Now, there is no framework for accessing Self and must be done through direct access. 

- Can allow parts to continue to dissociate until they are able to have control of the choices.

Something else I read about dissociation recently that I really like is that it is like a compass for when our internal system goes out of whack. It is something that resets our internal world to function.

[O83nomo]

I am grateful for this opportunity to discuss IFS.

Is anyone still here?

[Papa Coco]

I just got this email today from Dr. Amie. She has a podcast. This particular episode is on IFS
   
https://biologyoftrauma.com/are-the-trauma-parts-of-you-keeping-you-sick/

I have found that IFS work is, so far, giving me the most benefit over most of the other healing techniques I've tried.