Living As All of Me

[SenseOrgan]

I hate blending with the inner critic. It happens to me too sometimes HannahOne. It gets really ugly and hopeless. Usually it includes looking back at my life and comparing it to a meritocracy flavored standard that doesn't include the massive accomplishment it is to survive/navigate CPTSD.

Recalibrating is fine. Perhaps you would make different choices now than you did before. That doesn't make you stupid. To the contrary. Where is the past? What are your options now? What do you value? I hope these questions don't exacerbate the midlife stuff! You're a wonderful person!!!   

[sanmagic7]

You aren't hopeless, that's just the negative self worth we all seem to struggle with reacting to feeling good.  I think it's a natural part of getting better.  Healing isn't linear.  Maybe it's even proof that you are healing.

i completely agree w/ this, and w/ NK"s allusion to a bump in the road.  i know a lot of hit this particular bump, and there's a saying i've read here that has been too true so many times:  this, too, shall pass.  i'm not one for platitudes, but i believe this saying is not like that.  i've seen it played out too many times.

so, hang tough, ok?  we've got you.  love and hugs

[Marcine]

Hannah, I'm just a beginner at learning self-acceptance, so take these thoughts with a big grain of salt, ok?

I've found it hardest to simply stop running. The mind running, the body running around. To just pause. No need for answers or doing.

Nothing to fix (I learned that in a meditation class offered by the CPTSD foundation that Kizzie recommended here on the forum).

It's radical stuff and difficult as heck for some of us, certainly for me.

But slowing down seems to allow more of me to catch up and then there's a chance of staying connected moving forward.

I hope you feel some solace soon. You've been working hard and processing a lot. Maybe a true rest-and-recharge on your terms is in order?

Sending love

[Hope67]

Sending you some love and hugs Hannah